Wednesday, June 25, 2003


My cats are wierd. They are. Every night when I come home from the gym, I usually have to pee. (This is relevant, trust me) Anyhoo, since it's just me home, I usually leave the bathroom door open. Both cats usually come in, Ben will go straight to the bathmat and start cleaning himself, while Asa will shimmy up to me ass first, inviting me to scratch his ass and pull his tail (because he's wierd like that) then will settle down next to Ben (only Asa stays on the linoleum) and will start cleaning himself as well.

This will go on for a second, usually no more than one or two seconds, when Ben notices Asa. Upon noticing that someone is copying him, he jumps into the bathtub. and you know, that's just wierd anyway, because Ben is deathly afraid of water... but anyhoo, he gets in there and by this time I'm usually at the sink washing my hands and face; getting ready to get in the shower. I can hear him cleaning himself in there, and so can asa... it drives him crazy.

Asa is too much of a pansy ass to get in the tub though, because though Ben is deathly afraid of water, Asa is absolutely fucking petrified of water. We gave him a bath once and he screamed like a child that was being skinned alive... seriously, he didn't even sound like a cat. Anyhoo, so he will poke his nose behind the shower curtain several times and meow at Ben, all nervous like. Until Ben finally looks up as if to say "Um, do you MIND?"

He gets all offended like we are intruding. Then I have to physically pick him up out of the tub, because when I open the curtain and tell him to vamoose, he goes low to the ground like there's incoming missiles. But he won't move. He'd probably move if I turned the water on, but I don't want to be mean. It just kills me that they do this night after night... they seem to like the bathroom. This morning after my shower, I was getting ready and Ben came in and sat on the bathmat and started bathing himself. Wierdos.

I read in Someone's Diary yesterday that she thought Demi Moore's kids were, and I quote "Plain ass heifers" and I have to agree. Have you seen these girls?

first of all... it boggles the mind because even before Demi Moore shelled out all that money for a face and body, she wasn't deformed looking or anything...and Bruce Willis isn't too bad either, but my God... What's up with the Leno chins on the older two, and the youngest one has dark skin, those husky dog blue eyes, and light hair... reminds me of Children of the Corn. Freaky. I just don't get how two fairly attractive people produce such fugly offspring. And yes, I know karma is a bitch, and no I don't have children yet, and I may be tempting fate by being so judgemental and all, but seriously... especially the oldest one Ruler or Rumer or whatever the fuck her name is... all pasty and chinnish... I just don't get it.


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