Tuesday, December 24, 2002


The first one would be that I think I misspelled embarassing.... and am too frickin lazy to look it up to double check. The others would be that I am hooked on that Creed song they are overplaying right now... "I'm 6 feet from the edge and I'm thinking... maybe 6 feet ain't so far down" I hate Scott Stapp... not sure why, but when I see him singing on tv I get the uncontrollable urge to kick something. But the guitar riff in the beginning of that song is unbelievable. I love it.

I treated myself to a Christmas present this morning. I got a double non-fat iced mocha (with whipped cream---Merry Christmas to me!) and a blueberry muffin. What the hey; it's the eve of Jesus' birthday... I'm gonna allow myself a little caffeine and blueberry indulgence. :-)

I woke up with a stiff neck; I hate that!!! I woke up around 3 am when my sweetie left, (though he had planned on leaving at 130; we fell asleep and he ended up leaving a little late.) I couldn't fall asleep after that until like 4 or 430.... sucked! and now I have a bit of a stiff neck... not too bad though.

yes I realize I am kind of rambling this morning; must be the caffeine coursing through my veins... that and the ibuprofen for my toothache... did I mention that? I have had one mother of a toothache for the last 24 hours... it's getting old. Real old. Anyhoo; I am outta here, gotta be productive! MERRY CHRISTMAS!!

Friday, December 20, 2002


Ok, I realize it's been a few days since I've updated... sorry! I have been uber busy... and uber happy as well. :-) First things first... I have now officially lost 80lbs. You can see my progress here. I have been really into Yoplait light and fat free yogurt in Berries and cream.... totally tastes like something you would have for dessert. It does have one downfall though... the blue berries totally remind me of rabbit turds. I'm serious. I have to really watch for them, because I get oh so grossed out if one slips through... my philosophy on yogurt is that it's not something YOU EVER have to chew. So I can do without those nasty little balls of grodiness.

I'm ashamed to admit this; but I am absolutely hooked on the new Avril Lavigne song...I'm with you. It's against everything I stand for (yeah right) to be a fan of hers (who am I kidding?) but man, that song just gets to me. Also on the obsession list is Family Portrait by Pink ... have you seen that video? That little girl makes me sad.

Well... It's 5 days till christmas and I'm still not done shopping. Soon my child, soon. I anticipate getting it all done next week. (you think?)

Well... I gotta jam, gotta get some stuff done; oh by the way... HAPPY BIRTHDAY HOLLARD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Monday, December 16, 2002


Good God I can't believe Christmas is less than 9 days away... I haven't really even begun to go shopping yet. This weekend should be fun :-) I had a great weekend by the way; the pic on the front of this page is my cousin Lisa and I braving the rain and wind for a good photo op. :-) We went up to the mountains to go four wheeling, and had a blast. The whole weekend was awesome... but went by way too fast... I just wish this week would do the same. :-)

Tuesday, December 10, 2002


Ok... so I am usually a pretty chill person. By chill I mean that I fall somewhere in between serious and laid back ... I am not by nature a perky, bubbly person... though that's not to say I am a negative and dark person either.... I just don't smile 24-7... even when I am totally happy, I have been told I look pissed. (I am working on this though.) So this morning when I came into the office .... humming to myself (a little Whitney Houston ditty) I got a strange look from one of my coworkers, and another one asked me if I was ok. I didn't realize he was even talking to me; and when he asked again I looked at him surprised and smiled "Yeah, I'm great... why?" he cackled to himself and said "I've never seen you in this good of mood before; singing to yourself..." I just shrugged my shoulders and hummed all the way back to my desk. He chalked it up to Christmas time... but I am in a good mood, and it doesn't have anything to do with Christmas... but I'm not going to discuss it here EITHER... because with my luck it would jinx me, and you know; I'm not willing to risk it. :-D I will say though, that life is good. I've got perma grin, and the giggles and life is good.

Friday, December 06, 2002


So I dragged Lori out of bed this morning at a quarter to six to do our favorite workout; it's Cindy Crawford's first tape (I think she's put out 3) Oddly enough I am not sore yet; but have felt energized all day... usually I'm ready for a nap when we're done.

I'm in a good mood today... sang my heart out in the car on the way to work today to "How Will I Know" By Whitney Houston "Amor Prohibido" By Selena (yes I know the words.... con unas locas qui averte hoy... espero say a momento en que escuche tue vos... yeah I mispelled that line sooooooooo bad... I can sing spanish, I can't spell it!) and I also sang to "Giving Him Something He Can Feel" By En Vogue. Though if you've ever heard me sing, you would liken it more to screeching along to the songs... but hey, I was enjoying myself so it's all good. :-)

I downloaded like 8 songs on my lunch break today; my mom finally broke down and got high speed internet, and I'm totally diggin it. It used to take days to get that many songs... they would end up timing out or cancelling before the files were finished. I downloaded a bunch of old Whitney Houston songs... am totally into her old stuff right now... I wanna dance with somebody, where do broken hearts go... be my baby tonight... I got em all :-) I'm gonna make a compilation disc of all crackhead's best stuff. Did you see her interview with Diane Sawyer? Yikes. Though I was impressed... she never started to sweat once. Ok, that was mean, but still have you seen homegirl perform? She should wear terry cloth on stage... or dress shields, I mean come on.

found another interesting site online today; check out Michael Jackson's Baby Dropping game It's in terrible taste, but absolutely hilarious. While you are at it; check out monkeymofo.com that one is kinda funny too.

Wednesday, December 04, 2002


Man, I keep forgetting to tell you about my lotion dilemma. There is nothing worse than smelling bad or funny or wierd... we all know this. Hello that's why we wear the lotions and perfumes. Well, my favorite lotion from Victoria's Secret is called 'Love Spell'. A year or so ago when we had a rat that died in our office, and was rotting behind some cupboards, there was this heinous odor...I sprayed my Love Spell body spray around to try and cover up the smell. Unfortunately, the guys I work with must've thought that it was an air freshener or part of the rat smell, because whenever I use the lotion now, they'll sniff and look puzzled for a second, then ask me if we have a dead rat again. NIIIIIIICCCCCCEEEE. Way to boost MY confidence. lol, and no they aren't joking, they are dead serious and concerned... then I put on some tangerine lotion from bath and body works the other day and my mom, my wonderful mother ... comes out into the living room and says "what smells like vomit?" I didn't know what she was talking about; as my tangerine lotion smells like TANGERINE. She goes "well, it's either vomit or diarrhea... is it somebody's lotion or something?" That's when I remember that I just put some lotion on. I was like "uh, my lotion DOES NOT smell like vomit OR diarrhea." she shook her head and said "could've fooled me". Now I'm all paranoid as to whether or not to use my favorite lotions and scents... I don't want to smell like rotting rat flesh or vomit/diarrhea. Of all the things I could deal with smelling like, those two are not options. crikey.

By the way, if you are into reading online journals and stuff there are some great sites that offer interesting views on pop culture and current events. pamie.com is my current favorite. Then there's tomatonation.com which is another great source of entertainment. And lastly, but not least hissyfit.com most of these writers on these sites also contribute to a site that writes hilarious recaps of the shows you love to hate. you should check em all out.

I am in a good mood this fine Wednesday morning... even though it's freezing, and raining and my back still hurts. As I was getting ready this morning though; I had a flashback to high school... sophomore year in choir class... Tatum and I in a mini ... VERY mini production of 'West Side Story'. By mini, I mean there were like 8 of us girls who dressed up as young puerto rican peasant girls, and acted out and danced to a few of the main songs from the movie/play. "See the pretty girl in that mirror there... who can that attractive girl bee-ee-eeee.... such a pretty face, such a pretty smile... such a pretty me! I feel charming, oh so charming, it's alarming... how charming I feeeeeeeeeeel! and so pretty that I hardly can believe I'm real." lol, if I would have had more time this morning I could've scanned in some pictures from that performance... me in this hideous yellow skirt and red peasant shirt, tatum in purple and pink... both of us prancing around the stage with a fan in hand, singing our hearts out. What a wierd memory to come out of nowhere, I remember how much fun we had with that though. Aaahhh, the good ol days. What I would give to get my hands on a video of that performance.

If you haven't been listening to kiss 106.1 in the mornings lately, they are running this contest called 'What would you eat for the meet and greet'... Matchbox Twenty is going to be in their studio sometime soon, and if you go in and eat something disgusting, they will give you tickets to come in and be there for the interview and private performance. They've had these psychos come in and eat cat vomit.... booger toast.... and some stuff that's just gross after you eat a lot of it... like a dozen of the big cinnabons in an hour, 5 slurpees in 5 minutes... a wasabi sandwich.... 3 packages of raw hot dogs... drinking their own urine... You know I have had a few small celebrity obsessions.... (read entries in this journal in October and November to see what I mean) but I wouldn't eat ANYTHING crazy to meet anyone... not even Eminem... not only that, but even if I was so crazy in love or obsessed with a celebrity I wouldn't eat something like cat vomit to meet them... how do you think they look at you when they meet you? Hi, I'm the girl who choked down booger toast, and I'm your biggest fan... I can see Rob Thomas' agent standing there ready to jump in between when she tries to shake his hand... don't do it Rob! Think of where it's been... she had to harvest the topping for that toast man. So gross. If I was in Matchbox Twenty I think I'd be a little insulted. They've sold millions of albums, toured the world... made a buttload of money (and for those of you playing the home game, buttload is A LOT) and they now get to promote their latest album by doing small studio sessions and radio interviews, and have to do so in the presence of crazy people. No quick movements or urine boy'll blow. yikes.

Ok, so I have to rant a little.... I really hate those radio commercials for T-mobile... with Catherine Zeta Jones. I don't mind the ones on Tv too much; though I don't see those a lot because I have cut my tube time down dramatically. But the radio ones just irritate the hell out of me... those and the ones for Wilson's Leather... with the "vice president in charge of saying the word sale"... ugggghhh. I hate it! that lady's voice just kills me. I am also running thin on the J-Lo love... I actually hate that song 'Jenny From the Block' and just about died laughing when Tatum referred to her as a 'ghetto ass whore', lol ahhh we are both fans of Mr. Affleck...and we are both in agreement that he is indeed one of the world's Sexiest Men Alive... but he is losing major points daily due to the little fairytale between him and Jenny from the block. So trite. So trite.

I am totally hooked on that song 'Disease' by Matchbox Twenty... and yes, I probably should have mentioned this back in the previous area when I was discussing them before, but oh well. My favorite line is "you left a stain on every one of my good days" way to paint a picture man. Lovin it.

I am hoping to go up and get my books and stuff for school today; I'm giddy with anticipation. Those of you who know me personally know my attachment to office supplies... pens and notebooks in particular. It's a sickness really... I remember when I was going to HCC like 2 years ago, and every morning I would buy myself a pen or two (ok, like 3 or 4) and after a while I realized that the cashier in the student store must think I was special. I am serious... EVERY morning I would go in there, spend a few minutes browsing over some of the items I had no intention on buying, then casually walk to the glorious pen section... so big and colorful...they had just about ever kind of pen you could ever imagine. I would pick out a couple and buy them... after the first few times I couldn't even look the chick in the face as she rung them up. lol, I knew that I would think I was a little special kid if I was her... and I was ok with that, as long as I got my pens. Luckily I am over that obsession... rarely buy pens anymore... though I have a hunch I may be adding to my collection today. I've been good, I deserve them! Don't judge me. :-)

HAVE A GREAT DAY!!!!!!!!!!!

Tuesday, December 03, 2002


My back is killing me. Somehow I managed to wrench the heck out of it. I assume it was when I carried the 33lbs of cat litter around Costco yesterday. Intelligent she is, that Allison. So say a prayer that sleep will cure it. Sleep and a heating pad. Feels like it just needs to be cracked or something, but no matter what I can't seem to get the right angle to crack it. So everytime I take a breath I get a dull pain between my shoulder blades. MARVELOUS.

Thanksgiving was good; we had mom's side of the family, minus a few people over. It was peaceful to say the least, and that's the best part of the holidays in my opinion. Good food, good conversation, relaxing vibe... I was diggin it. Didn't do much Friday; did a little Christmas shopping.... had a really good weekend though, but it didn't feel like I was off for four days. I came back to work on Monday, in a good mood; even in the holiday spirit. I was thinking it would be tough to get in the mood to decorate this year, but I happily decorated our office tree and the front desk. Nothing spectacular, just a little red tinsel garland and of course the holiday cd's got dusted off. I had forgotten that I picked up a copy of 'Christmas with the Brady Bunch' last year... and of course you can't forget the ever popular South Park 'Mr. Hankey's Christmas Album'. The cds have been in heavy rotation since yesterday morning. I got up early today and went Christmas shopping before work... My sister is done and bought for. now just ma and pa ... and their stockings and I'll be done.

Ok, so normally I wouldn't admit this, but we're all family here, so ... I am totally hooked on that new Christina Aguilera song 'Beautiful'... it is a good song, and she is amazingly not 'in your face' in it. I can almost forgive the buttless chaps when I hear this song... if you didn't know better you would think it was an innocent young girl behind that voice... of course she stomps that image out with her spiked 'fredericks of hollywood' heels in her Dirrty video.

What else did I want to tell you...

I am sickened at the thought of war with Iraq... Seriously, Bush is just fucking itching to get us into a conflict over there... using scare tactics to rally support... makes me physically ill to think about it. Do I think Saddam is a threat? Yes. Do I think we should be cautious? Yes.... do I think anything he has done warrants us going over there and starting trouble? NO. Hello... doesn't it make you wonder why the U.N. was dragging their feet on pledging support behind Bush's proposal? Sure he's got the American public all riled up by tossing around words like nuclear war, atomic bombs... etc etc. What a bunch of bullshit...

sorry to get political; usually I try and keep my opinions to myself, but every time I log onto msnbc.com I see new headlines about the possiblity of war with Iraq. I just need to stop paying attention to the news, it either stresses me out or pisses me off; rarely is there a happy medium.

I am totally hooked on Yoplait light berries and cream... it's low cal and there's no fat (if you are obsessed about stuff like that like me) and it is SO FREAKIN GOOD! Tastes like a dessert more than a yogurt in my opinion.

Well, that's all for today; I am gonna go lay on my heating pad and cross my fingers that this pain will go away soon. Things could be a lot worse, at least life is good... if you check out my archives from this time or winter in general in the past and you can see that life was very different. I was in a darker place.... things are definitely looking up across the board. I can honestly say I'm happier today than I was at this time last year.... and I think with school and all, it'll continue to get better. :-)

Wednesday, November 27, 2002


It is so one of those days. I didn't make it to bed this morning until almost 4am. My grandpa was sick and my sister drove out to Auburn to take him to the emergency room around 6pm. At 10:30pm my mom and I arrived to relieve her; I was at that time tired, sore (I worked out a little too hard) and sweaty. Around midnight I noticed my already dwindling patience was gone... and I was no peach to be around. Actually, I think that statement is the completely underexaggerated... I was a fucking bitch to be around last night. I feel bad about this... I do. I don't like being like that, but it was almost out of my control... mom kept urging me to just lay down and sleep while we waited. I have slept in that fucking waiting room too many times already and it is uncomfortable, cold and ... it's not my bed, so I don't sleep for shit anyway. I was pissed because the 'on call' doctor was supposed to be on his way in at 10:30, and we were told it only took him 45 minutes to commute. His ass didn't roll in until 12:20... 2 HOURS LATER. I was pissed. Around 1 am, I told mom they should just quit dicking around and admit grandpa; but God forbid. Mom was as frustrated as I was; no one seemed to know what was going on... around 2 I was starving. We went up to Albertsons, so I could get something reasonably healthy to eat... I refused to eat anything out of the vending machine. I didn't sweat my ass off on the elyptical trainer and treadmill for an hour to eat a bag of m&m's. I was being snappy to mom, which I also feel bad about... I kept telling her I wasn't mad at her, and I wasn't... I was just frustrated at the entire situation. She was just the lucky one to get the brunt of it all shoved on her. I felt bad about snapping at her and being a jerk, which soured my mood even more. When we got back; I ate in the car and got to the point in my book that mom had warned me was hideous...violent... depressing... and just closed the book... I didn't want to read anymore. I sunk further into the dark after I read that chapter... almost wished I had never even picked up the damn book in the first place. Mom came out to the car and said that the hospital decided against releasing him like we were told and were now admitting him. He is being released today; but is still sick, so I anticipate a bumpy road ahead of us.

I got up around 8:30, dicked around for a while, got in the shower and made it into work by 10:30. I am wearing my new long sleeve tee from old navy that I got for 4 bucks... I love it. I like the way it looks on me and like that it is brown and not black. (most of my wardrobe is black) I was on the phone with mom this morning trying not to be bitchy when she was telling me about grandpa's night at the hospital... she had just woken up and was slurring her words to all get out and would say shit that didn't make sense... twice she mentioned him going to the veterinarean... I was like What the Fuck? As I am pleading with her to let me get off the phone so she can just call me back when she is coherent, I am leaning on my desk. After we hung up I noticed there was a post it stuck to my arm... not just any post it mind you, the very post it that I put my wad of Bazooka gum on... FUCKING MARVELOUS. I spent the next 20 minutes using ice to try and freeze the area so I could pick the gum off... which only succeeded in me getting little bits of gum every where else... so I slapped a piece of tape over the wad of gum and I will deal with it later.

Holly told me there is a product at Fred Meyers called 'goo be gone' that should take care of the offending mess... then we proceeded to have a conversation where I think she thought I was being pissy... I wasn't trying to, but she got off the phone rather quickly and I think now she's mad at me. Whatever. I don't have the freakin energy to deal with anything today.

Add onto it a conversation with my mother about me being a vegetarian... I won't eat the stuffing she is making because I don't eat meat, and she accused me of being obsessive. I don't think choosing not to eat stuffing that is COOKED INSIDE OF A DEAD ANIMAL (when I am a vegetarian) is being obsessive... And it's got bits of Turkey innard in it... don't get me wrong, I love stuffing. I do...especially my mom's ... but meat is meat is meat is meat and I can't do it. Do they even make vegetarian stuffing? I am going to pick up that goo be gone shit tonight and I will scour the shelves for some veggie friendly stovetop or something.

Something that makes me smile though... Lori hates christmas sweaters... I mean, really hates them. She gets angry when she sees people wearing them... as if there is nothing more vile in the world. I told her the other day "hey now, I had a christmas sweatshirt with snoopy on it when I was in high school." She just looked at me and I thought for a second and said "wow, that explains a lot doesn't it?" We both laughed. I saw a store when I was in the Alderwood Mall last week though that seemed to be all about the Christmas sweater... I think we'll start a new game. You'll get points for every sweater you spot and the more dangly shiny shit you see hanging off them, the more points you get. Walmart on friday should be in abundant supply of older ladies wearing their holiday best.

Well, I'm off to take a tranquilizer... don't laugh, I could use one right about now. My nerves are freakin shot today. And have I mentioned that my eyes are burning? Squinting is not cute... that brings up another awesome observation... I have a wrinkle in my forehead. I am serious. Not like the time I thought I saw the beginnings of crows feet on my left eye either... there is a fucking wrinkle in my forehead. I think it is because I have been squinting a lot lately; I need to get glasses, the ones I have are pretty much strictly for reading, and I think I need some everyday use ones... I need to go pick up some Oil of Olay. Crikey... I'm getting old. I can feel the pre-birthday depression setting in as we speak... and I've got till April to deal with it... though it may just be pms... at this point I can't be sure.


Tuesday, November 26, 2002


Since my office is closed both Thursday and Friday, today is kind of like a Thursday. There really is no reason for me to tell you that; other than it signifies just how incredibly bored I am at this moment. It's been a long day and I am wasting time before I head out to the gym.

Gosh... what's been going on... Friday night we Holly and Lori and I had plans to go out to an Irish pub in downtown seattle; but plans changed and we ended up going to Louie's to sing some karaoke. We had a freakin blast... ended up calling a bunch of our friends, some actually came down. I was way more loaded than I realized and though it was the 'Allison, Holly, and Lisa Show' (as we were up singing constantly) I didn't remember singing Barbie Girl until I was rifling through my cd's looking for work out music and saw the Aqua cd staring up at me. That's when I had a flashback and realized me and Lisa had sang that on Friday night. I had completely forgotten... I've forgotten a lot about that night... vaguely remember singing Fancy by Reba Mcentire, though I hear I rocked it arena style... yikes. Gotta give a good show to the droves of fans don't ya know. I also sang a couple Dixie Chicks songs with Holly and Lisa, a few Madonna tunes... and of course my songs that I always sing... Johnny Angel and How Will I Know... I changed some of the words to that one... though at least it wasn't as bad as the time I was singing and pointing to people in the audience. Good God.

We had so much fun though; totally relaxing up until Holly spilled beer in my hair... don't know exactly how that happened... one minute I am sitting there talking to Melvin, and the next minute I have beer in my eye, rolling down my face. I was kinda pissed. From there I am told we went to Taco Bell... though I couldn't tell you because I had decided to take a little nap in the back seat.

I was so fucking hung over on Saturday... I think my head hurt more from the cigarettes I took drags off; nicotine is mine enemy. anyway, luckily the hangover cleared up before we got on the ferry and went to see SHED. I get so impressed when I see them play; probably because I worked with two of the members (cody and brady) at safeco... none of my friends have ever been able to play music like that, and it's way impressive. I just wish they'd get more gigs on this side of the water. :-)

Monday, November 18, 2002


Man, what a busy weekend... Thursday afternoon, Ashley flew in from Arizona for a couple days. She and Lori and I all went out to dinner to Huckleberry on Thursday night, then we went down to Broadway, and I picked up a new shirt. I love it; will wear it on Friday night when a bunch of us are going out to this Irish pub downtown. Anyhoo, the next night a bunch of us got together, and played games and had a few cocktails... it was a lot of fun. We ended that night with a late night trip to Denny's... Saturday morning found Holly and I shopping at the mall, capped off with a salad in the food court. From there I went home to spruce up and then attended Holly's Grandma's retirement dinner at Angelo's restaurant. That was fun; after that Lori and Ash and I saw 8 Mile (yeah, I've seen it twice now... so what?) Sunday morning I drove down to Tumwater to meet Emma; Robert and Michelle's new arrival. She is an angel... I love babies at that age, (she is only 2 weeks old) so tiny and sleepy and cuddly. The rest of the day was pretty slow.

Oh yeah, I ran into my old neighbors and daycare clientele... the oldest daughter (who I met when she was in kindergarten) is now 14... I wouldn't have recognized her if I fell over her in the street. Totally felt old.

Thursday, November 14, 2002


So, Lori and I went to a travel agency last night, I had been informed that I won a free trip to Vegas... 2 nights and 3 days. So all we had to do was go up and give them an hour of our time, and the trip was ours. I knew it was a gimmick; but we grilled the guy on the phone so thoroughly, and he swore that there was no catch. So we go up there, and they are 15 minutes late in calling us in for our 'appointment'. That pissed me off to begin with, and Lori was getting irritated because there was this one short dude who was walking around, with his nasty chest hair showing and a gold chain around his neck... he was gross. Mr. Rico Suave or something...Totally thought he was God's gift if you know what I mean. Well, we get called back by a big guy named Paul who is older and has a gnarly speech impediment. He makes some joke about how did he get lucky enough to get the two single women. By this point I just kind of wanted to go home, but a free trip is a free trip right?

Well, right as dude is going into his schpeel, rico suave himself comes up and interrupts our sales guy, saying "Ladies, if I told you today about a great promotion could you afford to spend a thousand bucks?" I was like "uh, no." he responds with "how about 900?" and Lori interjected "um, even if I had a thousand bucks, I wouldn't give it to you." ok... awkward momentS of silence follow, finding me sitting there looking down, unable to make eye contact with anyone. Rico Suave looks perplexed and says "why not?" Lori says "because I don't know you, or what your company is..." he interrupts her by saying "Well I would tell you all about our company and the travel opportunities we offer." Lori just stared at him (I think; my panic system was in full swing so I don't remember all the details) Then dude proceeds to talk down to us and tell us that why doesn't he spare us the boring presentation and get us our free gifts, so he doesn't waste our time. He walks away and Lori was pissed.

Actually, I feel the proper term would be 'twitchin pissed'. she starts hissing at me "how DARE he assume we don't have the money just because we are young and female... how DARE he dismiss us like that and interrupt out salesman. What a dick!" I am laughing nervously at this point and Lori tells me that she is going to have to break it down for him and explain where he went wrong. Mr. Cocky comes back and sits down he gives us our vegas trip claim, and this free dinner/limo thing, and proceeds to explain both gifts to us, all the while looking at other customers and being rude. I thank him when he's done and Lori goes "I have a problem." He looked a little surprised for a second and then with the utmost attitude gives her the head shake and eye stare and says "Oh you do, do you?"

I should note at this time I have never felt more ghetto in my life. I applaud Lori for her balls, because this dick is the one who made us feel that way... she starts in by telling him that interrupting our salesman was rude and unacceptable, and how dare he assume we don't have the money, she could have a thousand bucks in her purse for all he knows. I think he was taken a little off guard and he apologized a few times. Then he asked Lori if she was interested in hearing the presentation and she fired back with "not now, I am not spending any of my money here." I was looking at the floor at this time trying to breathe calmly and white lighting the pain from my ulcer. Dude tells us that he was trying to do us a favor by sparing us a presentation that we weren't interested in, and Lori told him that we were interested until he walked up and was rude. He apologized again and then we left. yikes. My sister is scrappy, yo. :-)

Did you watch the J.Lo interview last night? Sadly, I must admit... I did. Let's all celebrate the joys of being rich and pretty! Life is good for Miss Thing, which gee... if I was engaged to Ben Affleck and a gazillionaire, with a body to die for... I bet I'd be pretty fuckin happy too. I don't even dislike her... I am just irritated with the glorification of her life being thrown in everyone's faces all the time... ok; I know, I made the choice to tune in... who's side are you on anyway?

And lastly... a few of you may remember that I had a few dreams earlier this year in which I found myself dating Bill Cosby... I had another strange dream last night. I dreamt I was meeting someone off the net to date and they decided after three dates they didn't want to see me anymore because I wouldn't give it up... oh wait... no, THAT ACTUALLY HAPPENED, lol my dream was better than that actually. ;-P I dreamt that I was going to meet a dude named Joe, turned out to be Mr. Joe Perry of Aerosmith fame... dude, he's hot... way too skinny, but hot... and he's a little older than me... ok, so he's more than twice my age... BUT IT'S JOE FREAKIN PERRY! Apparently we hit it off, and he kissed me in it...Anyway, I am not gonna go into the details of the dream because it get's wierd, JLO makes a cameo as an undercover cop and my grandma runs an auto chop shop in the dream... totally wierd... but at least I can say I've kissed JOE FREAKIN PERRY!

Wednesday, November 13, 2002


Dude, I am so going to marry Kid Rock... I wouldn't even make him cut his hair. But he would have to walk around with a mic in his hand. You know what's funny though, watching him on stage, with his loads of stage presence and confidence... (Or as Lori would say... "he's a cocky little fucker isn't he?) He looks like his name should be Kid Rock...then to see him on TRL and stuff and be referred to as "Bob" (real name is Bob Ritchie) it's kinda funny.

Lori and I rocked out to Foreigner on the way to the concert... Jukebox Hero is our favorite Foreigner song, and let's just admit it, one of the greatest songs ever written. (Don't front, you know you like it) We had nosebleed seats, so the excitement level wasn't as high as it could have been, but it was a great show nonetheless. Kid Rock focused mainly on southern rock; though he did do his best stuff... Bawitdaba, Cowboy... when he started Only God Knows Why he held up a lighter, and there were so many lighters held up in the audience, that the light projected from them was pretty bright. Lori and I were in awe.

Aerosmith came out shortly thereafter and rocked the house... I feel like I have been to an honest to God rock concert now. Granted, I just saw Guns and Roses, and they are nothing if they are not rock, but these guys are icons... and so impressive... they started in on one song; and as soon as it ended they went right into the next one, never missing a beat, and not half assing it at all... I wish I had that much energy. I mean, shit, Steven Tyler is almost 55 and Joe Perry is right behind him... and by the way, Joe Perry is freakin Hot. Especially for his age... a little too skinny, but fuck man... what a hottie.

I've never been to a concert when so many chicks jumped up on stage and had to be carried off; security was all over that business. Totally worth it though... I am totally hooked on this song by kid rock and sheryl crow now, it's called Picture. You gotta hear it. So good.

Monday, November 11, 2002


Ok, so I was not so excited to see Guns and Roses on Friday night after Lori and I stood outside in the cold, and the rain for an hour... well, longer actually, because the concert was an hour late... anyhoo, after we went inside and tried to clean up (we looked like drowned rats,) we claimed a spot by the barricade and settled in for the concert. CKY was the first act... and though their music wasn't bad, one of the guitarists was an absolute idiot and ruined the show... he was annoying and stupid... I hated him almost as much as I hate scott stapp (that asshole from creed).

Mixmaster Mike was next (and when I told a friend about him the next day; I mistakenly called him Mixmaster Dave... I don't know why, lol, but felt like a real ass... completely dated myself... I guess I am not the young hip music lover I thought I was. ;-P) He was pretty good; but the excitement level was slowly deteriorating the longer we had to wait. Finally when they did take the show, and the opening riff of 'Welcome To The Jungle' filled the Tacoma Dome... the excitement was palpable. Axl wailed for about 2 hours... performing a small handful of new songs, but mainly performing all the old hits... Sweet child of Mine, November Rain, Patience, My Michelle, Live and Let Die... finally ending with an encore of Paradise City. It was awesome. No it was FUCKING AWESOME. Best concert yet. Totally worth every penny, and I would see them again in a heartbeat. I would say they were a ton better than they were on the MTV Video Music Awards. So much better than I even anticipated.

After the concert, Lori and I joined our cousin and some of his friends down at Hell's Kitchen; a bar in Tacoma, to see some live bands on the Jagermeister Tour. That was pretty fun, I love alternative music...and these bands were screamers.

Saturday I worked at Husky Stadium; it was our last game, and probably the best. I spent the entire game bullshitting in the back, cooking hot dogs with my friends... and getting paid for it. I can think of worse ways to spend a Saturday. :-)

I went and saw 8 mile Saturday night... see the movie reviews for my thoughts on it... though I will say I AM IN LOVE. Lol, me and every other girl who saw that movie. God he's hot

Thursday, November 07, 2002


I love it when someone is shitty to you first thing in the morning, then doesn't bother to apologize, but instead acts like nothing is wrong afterwards. It's great.

Wednesday, November 06, 2002


Man, I've had the best couple of days. I don't really know why either. Even though it was raining and yucky out today; I just feel glad to be alive. :-)

The never ending pursuit of the unattainable is still on and a nagging presence... though I'm becoming more confident that if I want something I can have it; I just have to figure out what needs to be done to get it. For that I have to thank my friends; sometimes I feel so lucky when I look around and see the people I call friends... I can honestly say that they are all in my life for a reason; especially those close to me. Yes, I know I am getting mushy and sentimental; but I mean it. I can't imagine what my life would be like without them. Even when we are irritated with each other, I know in the end it will all work out and things will be fine. I've managed to weed out those who are not worth my time and effort; yet my circle of friends is large, and growing. I love that everyone knows each other and when we get together in a group; it's comfortable and familiar and most of all fun.

I am working down at Safeco field tonight for a soccer thing; Saturday is our last husky game and that's gonna be so sad. For me anyway; I will kind of be glad to take my weekends back from Ivars, but still... it's bittersweet :-)

I need to work on my shyness... I feel like I used to be a lot more outgoing; and though I don't hesitate to speak my mind on some things; I feel like I hold back around certain people and I don't want to do that anymore. So that's what's up with me at the moment, and thanks for asking. :-)

Oh yeah, don't be too dismayed, but I am going to pick up a copy of Justin Timberlake's new album... it's too poppy to pass up. Don't judge me! :-D

Tuesday, November 05, 2002


Ok, you all know what Friday is... I know I don't have to remind you. THE MOVIE to see comes out; that's right the long wait is over. So take your ass out and go see 8 mile. I will be going to see it on Saturday night, and will of course be updating the movie reviews page sometime after that to fill you in on the details. I went to see Barbershop last night, and the trailer for 8 Mile came on... I had yet to see it in the theater, and let me tell you, Lori dissolved into giggles when I just about choked on my piece of licorice. I told Lori that from here on out, Eminem will now be referred to as "My Baby Daddy." Yes, I know it's ghetto. No, I don't care. Ashley, you feel me dogg right?

Oh yeah, if you would like to catch a pretty cool band, SHED is playing on the 23rd of November in Bremerton... Lori and I are going, if you'd like to go with us; email me. :-)

Thursday, October 31, 2002


I am not going to write much about the tragic murder of Jam Master Jay... simply because there is enough being said on the news and everywhere else. It's so sad though... I don't really understand it.

Well, it's halloween... I went to the gym and got a good work out; they got new treadmills, and I'm stoked. Not only that, for the first time in over a month I am seeing improvements again... THANK YOU LORD!!! If I continue to plateau much more I am going to have a serious freak out.

So I am feeling really inspired today... as corny as this sounds, specifically by a song off the 8 mile soundtrack. It's called 8 mile, and my favorite passage in the song goes as follows:

Don't got a rep, my step
Don't got enough pep
The pressure's too much, man I'm just tryin' to do what's best
And I try
I sit alone and I cry
Yo I won't tell no lie
Not a moment goes by
That I don't pray to the sky
Please, I'm beggin you God
Please don't let me be pigeon holed in no regular job
Yo I hope you can hear me homie wherever you are
Yo I'm telling you dog I'm bailing this trailer tomorrow...

it goes on and on... I can relate. I've been in that situation before; actually it comes and goes for my situation now. Torn between doing what I want to do and doing what I know I need to do. Torn between being a slave to reality and chasing a dream...

Wednesday, October 30, 2002


Ok, before I gush about the 8 Mile Soundtrack... I have a small confession to make... I have REALLY only listened to the 5 tracks that Eminem himself appears on. I have listened to little bits of the other songs; but just wasn't interested as much in hearing someone named... Rakim sing a song called R.A.K.I.M. So shoot me; I'm biased. Anyhoo... onto my review....

The first track, is the one they've been playing on the radio; it's called Lose Yourself, and is the theme for the movie. Love it. Assuming you've already heard it, I'm going to move on... Track 2 is a song called Love Me by Obie Trice, 50 Cent and Eminem. I also really like this song; the hook is sang by a female who croons "I wanna love you for the rest of my life" and it goes on... very chill song. Track 3 would be the song 8 Mile by Eminem. Very fast paced; written from his character's point of view in the movie. Kind of rough; with a heavy hard core edge to it. Track 6 is called Rap Game by D12. I LOVE THIS SONG. Starts out with a pretty piano melody, then one of the guys from D12 starts in. This is probably my favorite song from the whole album. The last one on the album is called Rabbit run, also by Eminem. If you didn't know, his character in the movie is called 'rabbit' ... that's his stage name I guess. This song is angry, fast and also filled with a hardcore edge. Also written from his character's point of view.

Overall, a good album; too bad it has Macy Gray on it though. Loses a few points for that... much more hardcore and edgy than I anticipated... but it makes sense since the movie is about coming up in the rap game.

So I was reading on one of my many gossip websites yesterday that The Anna Nicole Smith Show has just been renewed for another season. Seriously folks... how sad is that? Have you seen that show? TRAINWRECK. It's almost as sad as it is irritating.

Well, I really don't have much to write about today... life is good and is getting better. Although I gotta say it would be a hell of a lot better if we didn't have daylight savings time. But maybe it'll work out; since I'm kind of a night owl anyway, maybe I'll get to bed at a decent hour, seeing as it feels like midnight at 8.

Tuesday, October 29, 2002


So, before I go on about the latest release from everyone's favorite Rap artist... I have a confession to make. I was at work this morning, listening to Jackie and Bender in the Morning... which is unusual because Jackie and Amy both have these annoying speech patterns... but that's really not the point. Anyhoo, I was listening and a song came on; with a familiar voice, and I couldn't place it right away. I started humming along to the song thinking to myself "I know I've heard this before..." I kinda liked the song and tried to remember who sang it. It's a female voice... kind of a husky, haunted voice in the beginning of the song. So I'm sitting there humming along, and then it get's to the chorus "... a moment like this..." all of a sudden I realize I actually like the American Idol; Kelly Clarkson's song. On principal; I refused to watch that show... and now, I am dismayed to admit... it's a catchy little tune. Oh the shame.

So, today is October 29th; which means you should drive yourself to your nearest music store, and pick up the soundtrack to the movie 8 mile. Oh would you look at that; as I write this, the song 'Lose Yourself' just came on the radio. It's a sign, I'm telling you. :-) But seriously; I advise you to pick it up. Besides having 3 new songs on it by Eminem himself; there are several other tracks from artists off of Shady Records, as well as some artists not affiliated. I will be purchasing this LONG AWAITED RELEASE (huh ash?) on my lunch break; you can expect a review this afternoon or tommorrow. If 'The Eminem Show' was any indication of where he is headed musically, I am sure I will not be disappointed.

So I went out for a bit with Choni Zipple last night. I miss hanging out with her; when we worked at Southtown we hung out for a couple hours during nap time every day. I forgot how much we used to laugh over our 'family trials and tribulations' as well as just the good ol' gossip. We also comiserated (sp?) over the fact that we are indeed getting older... though she's 30 and I'm not! (haha toni :-)) Both of us have run into some of our former students at the daycare and they are driving... as well as smoking... good God man, you were 11 and a half it seems just yesterday! Perfect example... When I met Toni, her son devante' was in the toddler room, still a baby, still in diapers ... he's in the 4th grade now. Depressing. :-)

I saw an ad for a movie I think I want to see last night; It's a new George Clooney flick... it's called Solaris. The ad I saw touts it as a romantic movie... a man who loses the love of his life; and somehow she comes back from the dead... so I go to one of my favorite sites this morning... The Internet Movie Database and look up Solaris. I read the plotline and it sounds NOTHING LIKE A ROMANTIC MOVIE... so now I'm confused... here's what it said about the plot:

Upon arrival at the space station orbiting an ocean world called Solaris a psychologist discovers that the commander of an expedition to the planet has died mysteriously. Other strange events soon start happening as well, such as the appearance of old acquaintances of the crew, including some who are dead.

So ... I guess we'll see...the movie doesn't open for over a month, but I'll probably still go see it. Afterall, it does star Dr. Ross. :-) Well, I'm outta here... I'll be back later with more on Marshall's new Album ;-P

Monday, October 28, 2002


Lori and I went to the Paramount on Saturday night to see Janeane Garofalo perform. Seriously, she is probably my all time favorite stand up comedian. I don't agree with some of what she has to say; basically because I don't consider myself a 'liberal' at all. Though I'm sure my cousin Geary would disagree ;-P But her set is filled with intelligent, acerbic commentary on today's issues as well as a few hilarious comments on Mtv, and the new Christina Aguilera video, and the ever popular George W. I have seen her live twice now; and both times have had the urge upon leaving to broaden my vocabulary. I need to start incorporating better words and phrases... such as paradigm, mortal coil, willy-nilly and the like into my repertoire. Incidentally, for those of you keeping score at home, I may have just used the word repertoire incorrectly... but I digress. :-)

So anyway, the entire point of this entry is that if you have a chance to see Janeane Garofalo perfom live; I strongly suggest you do it. Not only will you walk away laughing, but you will also find yourself contemplating things in a different way...

Thursday, October 24, 2002


The pic on the front of this page is Matt being goofy. He was putting dishes away and I was making fun of him, because I'd never ACTUALLY seen him lift a finger to do anything ;-) So he took the knife out and was being a dork; until my mom told him he was going to put someone's eye out, lol ahhh no matter how old we get, there are still people there to watch over us.

So, I started taking a multivitamin... does this mean I'm getting old?! I was actually concerned that I am not getting all my necessary nutrients and minerals and whatever, so I bought a bottle of one a day vitamins for chicks. Well, the bottle says for women, but women are... grown ups and adults, so I prefer to think of myself as a chick... not a kid and not a woman... a chick. Maybe my new theme song should be that song by Britney Spears ... Not a girl, not yet a woman... but if I'm not a woman at age 25, what makes you think I'm going to feel like one at 30? (which is a mere 4 and a half years away)

This weekend Lori and I are going to see Janeane Garofalo at the Paramount. I am stoked; even though I have a nasty cold, and will basically be trying to stifle coughs during her show; but I don't care. Wild boars couldn't keep me from going :-) Besides, I dropped a lot of dough on those tix... that's my grandpa E. coming out in me... gotta get my money's worth. ;-P

Monday, October 21, 2002


What a long weekend; went to Creston/Wilbur for a memorial service this weekend. Spent about 12 hours in the car between Saturday and Sunday... was VERY glad to come home last night.

On the upside I got to see Kylie this weekend, she is getting so big. tomorrow she will be 20 months old. she is big into mimicking (I think I spelled that wrong...) and imitating. Matt's middle name is Vernon (he hates it) so I got her to say Vern a lot; which was actually pretty funny. :-) I can't wait until she's speaking in phrases and such.

Well I am actually really tired today; so I am not going to put in much effort this morning... I'll write more later on this week.

Sunday, October 13, 2002


What a weekend... another jam packed couple of days. I sit here as I write this on Sunday evening around 9:45 pm ... tired tired tired :-) But in a good way. Friday night I went to see 'Sweet Home Alabama' ... see the movie reviews for my thoughts, I also met Holly and Stephanie and Lori for dinner at Red Robin. We hung out at Steph's house afterwards, and made it to work at Husky the next day on 3 hours of sleep.

We were all set to decorate Melvin's car with toilet paper and shaving cream, because loser called and told us he was going in early, but he parked someplace different than where he normally does. Holly was really disappointed. :-)

Work on Saturday was good... probably the best yet.

After we left Husky, Holly and Ryan and I stopped at the Burien Oktoberfest thing... had a drink in the beer garden, and discussed some of the shit that has been going on lately. We met up with Tatum at Louie's later on that evening, and settled in for a night of karaoke assault. I signed Tatum and I up for 'Daydream Believer' little did she know... but we did a good job. I sang my usuals, as did Holly. Maria and Lauren and Ryan all ended up coming down that night and we had a blast. My sister, the angel came and picked our drunk asses up and even took us to Taco Bell.

When we got home, we all crashed and slept until about 730 or so. We went to Breakfast at Huckleberry Square, served to us by our favorite surly waitress... :-) and I spent the rest of the day vegging out... Although I did clean my room, and it is now liveable.. thank you lord. Anyhoo, I am beat so I am going to drag my ass to bed and have sweet dreams... not like last week when I dreamt that flea from the red hot chilli peppers stabbed me in the lower back 7 times... but that's a whole other journal topic. :-)

Monday, October 07, 2002


Man... the last two weeks have been so ... eventful. Nothing I really want to delve into right now; but work is going good... enjoying husky stadium more each game I work. Am hooked on an old weezer song right now; a friend recommended I listen to it... below are the lyrics. Very climatic song... and fulled with Weezer's trademark guitar skills.

"Only In Dreams"

You can't resist her
She's in your bones
She is your marrow
And your ride home
You can't avoid her
She's in the air (in the air)
In between molecules
Of oxygen and carbon dioxide

Only in dreams
We see what it means
Reach out our hands
Hold on to hers
But when we wake
It's all been erased
And so it seems
Only in dreams

You walk up to her
Ask her to dance
She says, 'Hey baby
I just might take the chance'
You say, 'It's a good thing
That you float in the air (in the air)
That way there's no way
I will crush your pretty
Toenails into a thousand pieces.'

Only in dreams
We see what it means
Reach out our hands
Hold on to hers
But when we wake
It's all been erased
And so it seems
Only in dreams

Only in dreams...
Only in dreams...
Only in dreams...
Only in dreams...
Only in dreams...
Only in dreams...

Friday, October 04, 2002


Lori and I just got tickets to see Guns and Roses at the Tacoma Dome on november 8th!!! I am going to have to break out the acid washed jeans, and keds... don't forget the scrunch socks and can of aqua net yo.

Seriously though, I am stoked... I bet it'll be an awesome concert; if only in terms of stage presence and audience excitement. I hope Axl's voice is stronger than it was at the vma's but even if it ain't it'll be all good.

Wednesday, October 02, 2002


I must apologize to the 2 or 3 faithful readers of this journal, I know I haven't posted anything in a while, but that's only because I've been busy... and social! Though not as social as I'd like ie: what's it take to get a date around these parts?! But don't get me started on that, you can ask Tatum about my little 'tangents'.

Anyhoo, well the Mariners sealed the deal and my nights and weekends at Safeco Field are now over, at least until next season; though I am undecided if I will return. It was kind of sad to say goodbye to all of my cronies there... Cody, Brady, Snakebite (John), Christy, Vincent, Roy, Shelly, Melvin, hell I'll even miss Pedro. Maybe. I will still see some of them... I hauled my cookies all the way to Bremerton last Saturday night to see SHED play at the Empire Night Club... that's Cody and Brady's band... though Brady was sure to call twice that day and make sure we were going, he failed to call that evening before we left to tell us it had been canceled at the last minute. Oh well... there are worse places to be on a Saturday night then riding the ferry back to Seattle... though Lori was kinda pissed that we missed our chance to see Vanilla Ice performing at Jillians in Tacoma.

Let's see... what else has been going on... oh yeah, since Safeco ended, Holly, and I are working at hell on earth; aka Husky Stadium... it's like serving clam chowder while you are camping. In the woods. A complete bare bones operation AND IT FUCKING SUCKS!!! Hollard spilled clam chowder all down the front of herself last time, and earned the nickname chowderpants... which she hates...that and when we lean in and go "dude, you smell like clams."

Some new pics... if you want to see a pic of a group of girls I went to high school with, click here. From the left it is Cathy, Me, Chloe, Quyen and Sara with Jessica in the middle front. We got together for a potluck; as we try to do a couple times a year. And here is a closeup of my new hairdo.

Tuesday, September 17, 2002

Thank You For Being A Friend...

If you've seen me lately, and I look tired, the pic on the front of this site is to blame. The Lifetime Channel (television for women in case you didn't know) shows Golden Girls every night at 11, followed by Designing Women at Midnight. This is why I am not sleeping... to catch up on these Godforsaken RERUNS!

Between Sophia Patrillo and Suzanne Sugarbaker, I don't know who I'd rather emulate. These shows are hilarious, the writing is hilarious. I mean seriously, no wonder these were hit shows. Enough of this... I could babble on and on and on... I am in a really good mood today; actually it's either a good mood or I've had A LOT of caffeine. Could be both.

I am checking out the latest release from the Red Hot Chili Peppers, it's a great cd. Very relaxing... very easy to listen to; especially in the backround at first, until you decide what songs are your favorites. Right now I love the title track 'By The Way' the album is very reminiscent of Californication... which is one of my favorite albums by anyone ever.

I burnt my tongue on my coffee this morning, and twice today while chewing trident I bit the hell out of the inside of my cheek. I'm a little special kid I tell ya. I actually bit it hard enough to bleed once. God, what the hell; what is this new fangled chewing putty doing to me?

Tuesday, September 10, 2002


I am so hooked on this song by Nelly and Kelly Rowland, called Dilemma. It's so good; not what I would expect to hear from Mr. Nelly. I also love that song Girlfriend by Nelly and Nsync... could I be a St. Lunatic fan? It's quite possible. Kelly Rowland is one of the two poor unfortunate souls who are to Beyonce Knowles (Destiny's Child) what the Supremes were to Diana Ross. Of course the difference is that Diana Ross has class... and well.. Beyonce, we won't go there. Pull them draws up though girl, no one wants to see your back fat... and yes, you got it.

Have you ever seen "The Little Mermaid"? Ursula, the mean sea witch cons all these mermen and mermaids into basically selling their souls to her and she promises them whatever they want; but the deal never get's sealed, and they end up rotting away on the ocean floor under her power, anyhoo; that's kind of how I see the two girls in Destiny's child... though I don't consider Beyonce evil, more like her dad who manages the group. lol, kind of a sick way to look at their situation, but I'm serious... did you see anyone else in Austin Powers? Nope just his daughter. I'm all for branching out, but stay true to your partnerships. I saw an episode of cribs on mtv a while back, and I guess they live together. (The 3 girls) and I commented to who ever was watching it with me, that they better watch their backs, because they are on Beyonce's turf. Once she gets a solo record deal, they're gonna pull up to the gate, and their little keycard is not gonna fit.

Thursday, September 05, 2002


I am so hooked on that song 'Just Like a Pill' by Pink... hands down the best cruising and wailing song in a long time. Perfect for a sunny day. (Yes I rocked it in my gold eye sore as I drove home on my lunch break today.)

I ordered a dvd off ebay today and so cannot wait to get it...'death row uncut' features a lot of old videos and performances by Tupac, Dr. Dre, and Snoop Dogg among others. I am so into rap lately... I have always liked it, but now am listening to it pretty much non stop.

I have had a pretty good week so far, Labor day weekend I had to work down at Safeco, but it was all good. I will miss my Kidd Valley cronies when the season is over, though I will put in a brief stint at Husky stadium. (it's only a 6 game commitment though, so I'm not worried about it.) Went out on Sunday night with a bunch of friends for Tatum's birthday. Thought I was doing fine until we got to the bar, had had some margaritas that didn't even taste like there was tequila in them (so good) and a few sips off of the whiskey... lol, anyway we sat down across from Melvin and his friend and Lori orders me a beer... I took one sip and knew that that would be the straw that would just break my back. So I continued drinking water from then on out. We left the Yardarm and went up to Louie's but they were on vacation, so we went to the Bullpen and ran into some familiar faces. Tatum and I sang 'Copacabana' and did so with much more flair than boring old Barry Manilow. By the time we left there and went to Holly's it was almost 3 am, so I just drove home, I was totally fine by that point. I hadn't had anything to drink since 8:30 or so.

anyhoo, that's all that's been going on on my end... that and watching some of the dateline 9-11 specials... the ones about flight 93 fucking kill me. I'll probably head down to a vigil on the 11th... seems only right to pay respect.

Friday, August 30, 2002

2002 VMAs

I have been watching the advertisements and special programming for this big show for the past month and a half, and I really wish they had warned us that they were filming this bitch in digital. The swooping angles and wide shots were completely distracting, I felt like I was watching a 'behind the scenes' documentary or a movie... It looked more like a pre-filmed production than a live event...

Anyhoo, I have decided that Mr. Michael Jackson himself will now be called "The Commander." Did you see those shin/knee pads he wore when he accepted the millenium award? And what's with thanking David Blaine? It's all good; I just don't get it. We already think you are wierd dude, why make it worse? I kept expecting him to hold up a sign saying "Sony Opresses Artists of Color" or something... if you haven't heard, I keep reading in all the gossip columns and seeing pictures of him protesting Tommy Mottola and Sony. He and Mariah Carey together against Mean old Tommy Mottola... I can see why Crazy, I mean Mariah would say he opresses her... bitter much? I haven't figured out why the Commander jumped on that bandwagon. A co-worker mentioned this morning that his wife figured out who the Commander looks like. The female ape from Planet of The apes.

Anyhoo; I am watching Sheryl Crow perform right now, and suspecting the Commander to come out on stage... I just have a feeling he will, because I know she used to be his back up singer early in her career. They alluded to some big surprise and that's my prediction. We shall see...

Ok, Anthony Kiedis, you are so cute... so so cute... why must you speak? It shatters the illusion. Sheryl Crow is done singing, and now I think that the 'big' surprise was Rudolph Giuliani showing up... WTF? I like Rudy just as much as the next guy, but I have a hard time believing that MTV would waste time touting him as a 'big surprise'. How Lame. The ad for the new movie 'Ghost Ship' just came on... an abandoned cruise ship haunted by mean and evil ghosts. I looked at Lori after the preview was over and said "not a chance in Fucking Hell." she laughed, and I said "let's combine two of Allison's biggest fears... bodies of water and ghosts... Mean ghosts that is." I nervously looked around, and Lori started laughing. This Labor day weekend will be 5 years since Lori woke up to find the ghost of that little girl sitting on her vanity. She's created bits of chaos since, but lately it's been quiet... though now that I am acknowledging that I'm sure the games will begin. But anyhoo, back to the topic at hand...

Avril Levine... Why do ya have to be so irritating? Michelle Branch... ick. Everyone in the People's Choice category got robbed, and I blame Mary Kate and Ashley. Who by the way are on the fast track to becoming the new bitch ass debutantes of the minute like Paris and Nicky Hilton... who are famous for what anyway? Partying? Being rich? I know one of em dabbles in modeling... must be a hard life... now I sound bitter...

Britney, Britney, Britney... This is the VMA's... not your local biker bar.

Christina... seriously... fuck man, we get it you are ghetto fabulous... and what was with the malibu barbie outfit... yikes. I swear we were about 2 seconds from nipple city.

TLC's time on stage was touching... and I think it's awesome that MTV established that scholarship in Lisa Lopes' name. Bravo.

Pink..."I'm too drunk for this" oh yes you are... though it was kinda funny to see Jimmy Fallon goof on her afterwards. But seriously, how low do your jeans have to be?Good God.

The Hives... I don't know you... but your music sounds ok... but I think the world only needs one Mick Jagger.

Shakira... I want to know how many dollar bills got stuffed down her pants backstage... someone has been taking bellydancersize in her spare time. I saw her in the diary special "getting to the VMAs" and she said that there were only two places in the entire world where she felt completely uninhibited. One was the bathroom and one was the stage. Let's all say a little thank you prayer that she didn't confuse the two tonight.

Justin Timberlake... That hat is not tight. I don't care what your agent/stylist/manager/choreographer said. I gotta say though, he did do good on his performance, you gotta give credit, where credit is due. Lori and I amused ourselves in the pre show though to be noticing that when John Norris spoke to the other boys from Nsync, Mr. Timberlake was missing from the usual group photo op. He also didnt' sit with the boys, and the fact that we even notice this shit is just sad.

That said,

How cute is Jimmy Fallon? Well he'd be a hell of a lot cuter if he wiped the blush and lipstick off... though I dig the short hair. And homey has balls... making fun of fat joe while he sat in the audience, pretending he was lance bass and 'waxing the capsule' , joking about Brandy's ...assets. Commenting on the Commander's plastic surgery... good lawdy miss mawdy...

P. Diddy... not one to disappoint. I recently have been humming the tune from 'Pass the Couivosier' (sp?) I love the video... simply for the spoof on Harlem Nights in the middle, and the cameos by Jamie Foxx and Mr. T. Plus Busta Rhymes kicks ass in that video... and I am not by any means a Busta fan. So when they went from I need a girl to the remix and then to Pass the Couivosier.. I was one happy girl. Lori and I want to know who the little kid was and I said maybe it was Jonathon Niplicky... and yes, like I told Lori I realize his name is Lipnicki, but Niplicky makes me laugh.

The White Stripes... who the hell... I mean what the fuck... er... I just don't get it.

Linkin Park... They rock and I am so glad their video won an award. Their lead singer is so cute I just want to pinch his little cheeks. The ones on his face perverts.

Eminem... oh, what do you say... I'll start with his performance... I was glad to see him perform White America, but thought the shirtless performance of "Cleanin Out My Closet" took the cake. For obvious reasons. When he got his first award, he was pretty eloquent and gracious... then he had to go ghetto on us... granted I think that stupid insult dog is a waste of everyone's time... when he tried to talk to Eminem after talking to Moby... and Eminem refused saying something about Tv Time... don't quite get what he was saying, though that could be because the producers and Powers that be behind the scenes were quick to voice over and introduce Christina Aguilera... who incidentally got to present Eminem with the award for best Rap Video (I think) Which had to be fucking uncomfortable. Then the whole... "Keep crying little girl, I will hit a man in glasses." He was obviously talking to Moby and during his acceptance speech of all places... oh so ghetto... but still hot. Don't Judge me. That's what you gotta love about the VMA's... you don't see shit like that at the Oscars. Detroit Represent!


Lastly but definitely not least, the one and the only Axl Rose... homey has gained a little weight and doesn't look so near death now. I remember back in the day when he would wrap that greasy hair of his in a bandana and rock out in a belly shirt and his undies... looks like age and maturity have nurtured a little good taste... or at least better taste. I wasn't feeling the dreadlocks, but he put on one hell of a show. Though I had to wonder... where was Slash? Where are you Slashy? I'll never forget seeing him present years ago with a glass of beer and a cigarette... class man... he was in a class of his own. How fucking cool would it have been to have been in the pit during that performance?

Well those are my thoughts on the big show... I can rest easy now that I know Rudy Giuliani wasn't our big surprise. Jimmy Fallon looked like he was about to wet himself when he introduced Guns and Roses. Overall I was entertained, which is why I watch afterall. Though I also have to say that during the preshow Sway... the mtv vj who wears the head wrap was getting on my last nerve... as was Gideon Yago... false excitement ... so not yay.

Monday, August 26, 2002

Au Revoir Bibby Lou

Well, Bobby returned home to Sweden on Friday, we miss him a lot. I feel like the summer has just flown by... I have had a blast though. I really wish he could have stayed... I know he had a wonderful time with his dad, hanging out at their bachelor pad. I will be heading to Sweden in the next couple of years... I was going to go next summer, but we are hoping he will come out for Matt and Kelly's wedding instead. So I am thinking of going the following spring... we'll see.

I had a loooong weekend... went to Louie's on Friday night, met up with Connor (one of Me and Lori's oldest friends) and some of his friends. Holly and Maria were there too, and Troy even made a cameo. We had so much fun, I sang Ode to Billy Joe (which... I slaughtered to say the least) and Connor helped me sing New Attitude by Patti Labelle... we had fun, but I remember distinctly hearing my screeching voice over the speakers ... though I didn't much care at that point. The wonders of alcohol.

Lori and I took mom to Leavenworth yesterday for her birthday (which was actually August 5) we had a really nice day, shopping around and had lunch at Gustav's... I bought some cool silver earrings, and a silver claddagh ring... I now have 2; would have had 3 but gave one to Hollard. We also went into Wenatchee for a bit, it was a long day, but a nice one.

Lori and I also took Kylie for the day on Saturday, we went on a ferry ride and explored a little of Bainbridge Island... there ain't much to see though. She is so funny. She's starting to talk and we got her to say homie a few times. She answers 'no' to everything, so we had fun with that. "Hey Kylie, do you think Lori smells Good?" haha, it was great.

Tuesday, August 20, 2002


The pic on the front of this page is Marshall Mathers, a publicity photo from his upcoming movie 8 Mile, which opens in November. You can bet I'll be there opening night... I have seen the trailer a few times, and it looks really good. :-) What else would I say though, given my new obsession. :-)

I am getting over viral bronchitis... I am tired of coughing. I am tired of the headaches I get from coughing. I am really tired of this hideous taste in my mouth and nothing tasting right. I can't even chew gum without getting grossed out, because it tastes disgusting.

Bobby leaves us on Friday to go back home to Sweden. :-( We are all going to miss him so much, this summer has been a blast, and I wish it didn't have to end. He has amazed us in the fact that he and Uncle Gary are almost identical. There is a definite resemblence, but their mannerisms, and personalities and laughs... everything is the same. It's crazy.

Wednesday, August 14, 2002

Patrick Swayze Revisited...

Ok, for anyone who missed the memo, I am for sure on the Eminem bandwagon. Ya think? Anyway, I just saw the 'CLEANIN' OUT MY CLOSET' video, and I am impressed. It's a tad disturbing... mainly the shots next to the grave he's digging... though it's not as violent and in your face vengeful as some of his other works. More than anything though, it proves his ability to be diverse and doesn't undermine the intelligence of the song. In fact, I think this video in particular only enhances the lyrical content of the song. Basically it's a damn good video, and my man slim looks fine as hell in it. :-) Had to break it down you know. Haven't had a crush on a celebrity like this since the 6th grade when Jenny Reddick and I wanted to marry Patrick Swayze. Dirty Dancing changed my life... well maybe not my life, but 6th grade wouldn't have been the same without Baby and Johnny.

I sit here a sick girl. I am only even updating my website, because I am procrastinating using my inhaler. I broke down and went to the doctor today; I have viral bronchitis. VIRAL. VIRAL. As in no antibiotics... as in "we'll have to let this run it's course." Don't get me started. Anyway, she did give me a prescription for codeine cough syrup and this inhaler to help loosen up my chest congestion. I hate inhalers and am stalling for time. I have absolutely no energy, and my throat is killing me. I keep sneezing, and swear Ive lost 20lbs just from blowing my nose. I have enough cold medicine running through my veins right now to kill a small child. It's been a long couple of days.

We went to the cabin in Leavenworth last weekend. It was Holly, Aaron, Matt, Kelly, Lori, Bobby, and I. We had a blast. We partied and blasted music from the time we got there until the time we left. I'll write in more details later; I just have no energy right now... time to go suck in the inhalants... wish me luck.

Thursday, August 08, 2002

Me and Marshall...

Ok, so I admit that I am not really dating Marshall Mathers, aka: Eminem... but I wish I was!! I did some fancy work on my computer to make this picture... let me know if you think it looks real!

I did see him in concert on Tuesday night. HE WAS AWESOME. It was Bionic Fury... I think, I can't remember their name. THEY SUCKED. Then came Xhibit... who sucked, followed by Ludacris... who sucked. Papa Roach was AWESOME!!!! And of course, dear Marshall came after that, he stole the show. We were about 15-20 feet from the stage, had a bunch of people in front of us, but could see him clearly. Could see his face, and expressions... it was so cool. He puts on a hell of a show. Normally I don't think I would find him very attractive, but there is something about a powerful stage presence that just does something for a person's appeal. I think Kid Rock is hot when he's performing... any other time he's a greasy punk... but on stage with a mic in his hand, watch out.

For now I guess I'll just dream about being Allison Mathers... ;-P

Monday, August 05, 2002

All I need is some dang sleep

Man, I am soooo tired! But happy. I had another long weekend, but a good one. Friday night, Melvin, Holly, and I met up with my sister and Bryan at Doc Maynard's in Pioneer Square. (Melvin is a coworker of mine at Safeco.) We had a few cocktails there, and headed over to the Bohemian. We had a good time there as well; though not as much fun as the last time... the music was a little lamer. We ended our night at the pizza place, having some interesting conversation...

Saturday morning found us back at Safeco, ENTIRELY too early. We had an early game, and I happened to read my schedule wrong, and wasted an hour and a half just sitting around because I couldn't clock in yet. Funny enough, Josh, Vincent, and Roy... some of my Kidd Valley cronies were there too early as well. So we sat out at the picnic area and visited. After the game that night, Holly and John (another coworker) picked Lori and I up, then we grabbed Bobby and drove out to Bremerton. These guys we work with at Safeco -- Brady and Cody are in a band called SHED. They were playing at a coffee shop, so a bunch of people from Safeco all showed up to show support. I was totally impressed, THEY ROCK!! They play all original music, and it's pretty hardcore metal stuff. They are totally awesome, great energy. We had a good time. It was neat to see all our coworkers outside of the stand. We drove back to Seattle rather than staying in Bremerton and partying... we were tired. Bobby, Lori, Holly and I ended up going to Azteca for dinner and drinks. It felt wierd not to be going out dancing... we've been such social butterflies lately.

Sunday was a great day at work, it went quickly! It was funny too; because Melvin, Raphael, and Vincent scared the shit out of me, Holly, Brady, Josh, and my sister. They called me over and I noticed Melvin was no where to be found, but didn't think anything of it. Vincent told me to look in the freezer; because I knew what it was supposed to look like, as I'd been there longer than them. I didn't know what he meant, but assumed they had either sold hardly any fries or a shitload. I open the door and melvin is sitting in there and says boo! I screamed and slammed the door. Holly jumped back when they did it to her, Josh jumped and drew his fist back as his first impulse, and Lori screamed like I did. It was so funny, I totally didn't expect that.

I have 8 days off from Safeco... kinda wish I didn't, was just getting used to the daily grind. Oh well, it'll be nice to see my family... was leaving the house at 7:30 am and not getting home until midnight sometimes. Wierd... I haven't watched tv in I don't know how long... but it feels normal.

Today is mom's b-day!!! Happy Birthay Ma!

Wednesday, July 31, 2002

Sooky Sooky Now

Man, I've been one busy girl. I guess I should begin by describing last Friday. It was a blast! Bobby, Lori and I went down to Pioneer Square, we met up with some friends of mine from Safeco, John and Christy. We had to walk about a mile into Downtown Seattle, as none of us were driving. I had blisters on my feet by the time we got there. But it was all good. We started out at Doc Maynard's, The Beatniks... Seattle's best band were playing there. We had a few cocktails, listened to some good music, then decided it was dancing time. We headed over to the Bohemian Cafe... I'd never been there before, and didn't know what to expect. We had to stand in line for a bit, but it was all good because we were all on the verge of being wasted. After entering, we had a few more cocktails, and started dancing. The best part about that place, was it wasn't too crowded when we arrived, but filled up pretty quickly. The music was all old school remixes... Snoop Dogg and Dr. Dre, Bel Biv Devoe, Young MC, Tone Loc... you name it, they played it. John and Christy left shortly before 1 to catch the last ferry home, and we continued dancing until the place closed.

When we left, we realized we didn't have any money for cab fare. Being hammered didn't help our situation any, as we passed a mini mart on our quest to find an ATM. We ended up walking allthe way back to Safeco field, to the 76 station across the street. Lori took her shoes off and went most of the way completely barefoot. I could feel my blisters burning, but didn't much care. When we finally arrived, bobby couldn't remember his code for his card, and we had to try to help him remember. I think that was the only time I've ever seen him drunk. He's so funny. Luckily he remembered and we caught a cab home.

Saturday evening, I went to the Waterland Festival in Des Moines. It's an annual event around Seafair time... a carnival. Years ago, I sold balloons there as my summer job... and ever since I go because I ALWAYS see people I know. Sure enough, I ran into several old classmates, and a few old coworkers. It's always nice to catch up and say hello. That night Lori, Holly, Maria and I went to Louie's and sang karaoke. I didn't drink, as I was driving... and I SHOULD NOT HAVE BEEN ALLOWED TO SING either. General rule of thumb is that if you are not a good singer, and not a confident singer... don't sing if you are sober. I always get up and do my thing when I've had at least one cocktail. This time I decided to try a rendition of 'Leader of the Pack'. I was all too aware of how my voice sounded, and it must've cracked about 5 or 6 times in the first line alone. I chock it up to nerves... NEVER AGAIN. If you care what you sound like, then forget it.

I ran into a classmate from Tyee at Waterland, and again that night at Louie's. Apparently he's seen our group there before, singing... making asses of ourselves I'm sure :-) but I've never seen him in there. How unobservant am I? The bar itself is pretty small, and I wouldn't think you'd be able to miss anyone in there... but apparently I have. We are planning another big Louie's blowout in a few weeks. A couple weekends ago we had over 20 of our friends in the bar... it was a total party.

So, I'm working on my book again. I am now editing what I have written... 46 pages thus far. Regular 8.5 by 11 pages, size 10 type, single spaced... I am wondering how many book pages that is... double? I have 22 chapters ... short ones, not sure exactly where I am going to end it... but the fact that I am reading through it now, is a BIG step. I couldn't get through it before without crying... my eyes tear up occasionally now, but I think I've finally passed the stage where I couldn't confront dad's stroke. I think I've finally accepted it. I can sit here and type about it without getting upset. Let's hope this trend continues. It's gotta get easier I would think. The last two years have been hell... it's time to start looking up again.

Holly and I are in the preliminary talks of possibly moving out together next spring. I really hope it works out, I trust Holly and vice versa. Plus I know she's not a psycho and vice versa...

Oh yeah, I got a raise at SAFECO! I now make a dollar fifty more per hour SERVING FRIES than I do at my 'real' job. Is that not the fucking saddest thing you've ever heard? Good God. Oh well, I can feel my sears card shrinking as we speak.

Friday, July 26, 2002


Thank the Good Lord it's finally Friday! Though I have no right to bitch, I thought yesterday was friday, and this week HAS gone by incredibly fast. I am so dang tired. I had some wierd dreams last night too; first one was about my cat Asa... dreamt he had shit all over the house. I was so mad in my dream, I didn't know what to do. Everywhere I turned there was cat shit. Then I woke up and fell back asleep only to dream that my sister was fighting with me...physically. Threatening to kill me and such. We were going to buy special donuts and she was being hideous. Finally I told her in the dream that if she didn't knock it off I was going to tell mom and it would break her heart to see her youngest daughter acting so nasty. Apparently that did it. She quit.

Well, I am four games into the homestand, only 9 more games to go. Only. It'll be good money though... am hoping to go back to being a blonde in August. Though there are a few goals I need to meet before then... so I'll be working on those pretty feverishly. Wish me luck... discipline is difficult.

This week has gone on with a few difficulties... fat bastard (my arch enemy and nemesis) has been on my back about anything and everything. I have firmly stood my ground though... Told him I'm not an idiot, so there's no reason to talk to me like one. He's such a nosy dick. Has to dip his fat fingers into everything. Drives me fucking nuts. GET A LIFE FAT BASTARD!

Monday, July 22, 2002


I hate people. I hate dealing with people who I hate. My asshole oral surgeon's office neglected to do a thorough enough inquiry into my benefits and quoted me at 280 bucks. I got a bill for 558 bucks. I'M A LITTLE BIT PISSED. I spent the morning on the phone with Dr. Chan's office, and Regence Blue Shield. Oh by the way, did I tell you that REGENCE BLUE SHIELD SUCKS? I swear to God, I should just move to Canada so I don't have to worry about insurance. I have to call the financial aid office at BCC today, and I am putting it off a little because I am getting the vibes that this just isn't my day. Although, I gotta say I am having a great hair day. Too bad hair doesn't pay the bills.

Monday, July 15, 2002


Man, what a weekend. I feel 19 again. :-) There is nothing like hanging out with your friends and laughing till your stomach hurts to make you feel years younger. Friday night, I went and worked out with Holly, Lori, and Troy. (I LOVE that we all belong to the same gym!) Anyway, after I pulled a hip muscle, and they were tired of lifting weights, we decided to go to Target and pick up some stuff. Lori and I bought a wedding gift for some friends of ours who are tying the knot this coming Saturday. We dicked around in Target for a while, before realizing we were all starving, and it was almost 10pm. We hurried through the rest of our shopping and tried to make it to Huckleberry (our favorite restaurant) before they closed. We made it with 2 minutes to spare, but they had already shut down.

We looked disgusting. Sweaty hair, workout clothes.. Mine was a trashy vegas tee, lori was wearing a Tyee High School tee with holes in the front, Holly's purple tee had stains on it. No makeup... icky pants... we looked like shit. The only place to go (as we didn't want fast food) was Azteca. I rationalized we probably wouldn't see anyone we knew; it was friday night; we should just go sit in the bar, out of the way, get dinner and it would all be good. Unfortunately I was wrong. I forgot about Karaoke Fridays. The bar was pretty busy, but we managed to snag a booth... but not before noticing I knew a few people who were mingling there. Kevin, a guy I used to work with was there with 3 chicks. (BIG surprise...not), a few parents of daycare kids from back in the day, and the random familiar face. Throughout dinner Holly would laugh out loud, because of our appearance.

Saturday, Holly came over at 10 am, we were going to head down to watch her sister Justine play in the Seattle All City Band in the John Stanford Parade. I couldn't find my wallet or checkbook. I ripped our house apart looking for them for about an hour. Finally I accepted that I must've dropped it in our parking lot the night before, and went to the dmv to get a new license, and the bank to cancel my visa. I was still holding on to the possibility that one of my neighbors might have picked it up. On our way down to the parade, mom called and a neighbor did indeed find it and returned it. (I am going to bake them cookies as a thank you tonight.) We enjoyed the parade, screamed our lungs out for Justine, she did really well. :-)

Saturday night we went down to pioneer square. That's the picture on the front of this website; Me, Holly, and Lori all dolled up ready to cut a rug. Troy drove my dad's wheelchair van with all of us in it; in true ghetto style, we didn't want to pay for cabs, so we drove the mystery machine downtown. the music sucked at every venue, but it was still fun. Laughing at poor Aaron laying drunk off his ass on the pavement was entertainment for everyone.

Sunday I hung out with my sister, and Matt and his soon to be brother in law Eric. That was nice too; we walked the waterfront and drove to alki. We used to do stuff like that all the time, I forgot how funny he is.

It was nice to be reminded of how much fun it is to just kick it with your friends.

Tuesday, July 09, 2002


Man, my ass and my inner thighs and my biceps are all sore today. I have been working out a lot lately; doing my Cindy Crawford workout tape in the mornings, and going to the gym at night. I love that tape though; it totally works you out, and makes you sore each time. I like to know that I'm working hard, so I take the sore muscles with happiness. But I do not particularly enjoy the 'tennis balls of pain' that I have right now. Seriously, feels like my musles are tight like a ball and when I move a certain way, it feels absolutely hideous. But I'll be down at the gym tonight, getting my walk on; gotta love those treadmills.

Royal Tenenbaums comes out on DVD today; you gotta see it. Awesome, awesome flick. Highly recomended that you see it. I am enjoying my 2nd day off (of a total of 15) from safeco. Though I kinda wish we were still on the homestand, I was having fun during the last one.

well, that's all for today; just an update, will write more later.

Saturday, July 06, 2002


Man, It's like 1pm on Saturday and I think I'm still a little hammered from last night :-) A bunch of us went to Louies and had a FREAKIN BLAST! Between me and Holly, we sang : Somethin to Talk about, Downtown, Like a Virgin, Heartbreaker, I love rock and roll... and I think that's all we sang together, then I sang I'm the only one with Maria and then I gave a solo performance of Johnny angel... I was dancing up there, getting into it. It was a lot of fun. Pics to be posted soon.

Saturday, June 29, 2002


Well, I'm sick. Sick, sick, sick, sick, sick. I can't take the sinus pressure, post nasal drip and painful chest coughs any more. I am so tired of being tired, and tired of popping pills. At any given time I'm pumped full of thera-flu caplets, advil cold and sinus as well as robitussin and augmentin for good measure. But alas, no relief.

So I sit here, on this Saturday evening, nursing my raw nose with a tube of chapstick... (many people think this is gross, but I'm telling you, when your nose gets totally raw and hurts from blowing it too much, buy a tube of chapstick moisturizer and use it; relief is immediate, and not obvious... there doesn't appear to be anything on your nose, and within hours your nose is almost back to normal.) Anyway, I'm sitting here munching on M&M's, drinking diet 7up and watching the first season of Sex and the City. I like Carrie's hair much better this season than the later ones... I've only seen seasons 2 and 3 in addition to 1, so her hair might've gotten cuter in season's 4 and now 5 but I wouldn't know. Man, I"m rambling... anyhoo, while we are on the topic of Sex in the City, I gotta say I loved Carrie with Big. Aidan was cool too; I like big and Carrie before Aidan, I didn't like her cheating on Aidan with him.

I bought Vanilla Sky. I don't exactly know why I decided to buy it... I didn't get it when I saw it at the theater. But it's totally watchable... it's just fucked up if you try and find any meaning in it. I hate Penelope Cruz... I have to agree with Cameron Diaz's character in the movie...she does look like a moth.

Well, I'm outta here, time to reload on cough syrup.

Monday, June 24, 2002


In the last few weeks, (well, since Bobby's been here) I seem to have gotten a life. Lori and I used to do stuff a lot, but now that Bobby's here, we do even more. Friday night we went bowling, with Uncle Gary and Tatum. Good Ol' rock and bowl. Then we dropped Uncle G off and went to Louie's (our favorite karaoke bar) and sang our hearts out. When the bar closed, we went to Denny's and had some riveting discussions...mostly me shooshing the slightly intoxicated, and really loud Lori and Bobby. I got into bed at 4am that night. I woke up around 9 the next morning, got ready and drove out to Redmond... which, by the way is no picnic when the 520 floating bridge is closed. Everyone and their brother were taking I-90 and 405. I got out to Matt and Kelly's house, late of course, and then picked up Kylie, and drove back to Seattle. I picked Lori up and we spent the day shopping and going to the beach and having a blast with little Kylie Nykole. She is such a cutie. And she is starting to talk too, saying "more" and "uh oh" and nonononono.

Saturday night, Lori and I picked up Troy and Lori's friend Amanda, and we headed down to Puyallup to see Jessica for her B-day. We went to a sports bar called Q'z in Graham, Wa. It was kinda fun, we people watched and talked shit... all in good fun of course. Then Sunday I was a busy bee and helped paint the kitchen as well as put my room back together after the whole water heater debaucle. (it leaked into my closet, molding the carpet... my room has been in an upheaval since they ripped the stinky carpet out 2 WEEKS AGO.)

I never did get around to ironing my clothes... although I did paint my toenails. I go back to work at Safeco tonight for the next 2 weeks straight. It's gonna be a long homestand.

Friday, June 21, 2002


Man, I am feeling really mean and vengeful right now. I am hesitating to say about what, simply because I am also feeling sad and wish that I could fix what is wrong. But at the same time, I just want to spit out the words that are on the tip of my tongue, and post unflattering pic after unflattering pic of the offenders.

I hate feeling disposable. That's what it boils down to. I am fighting off the anger and resentment, because I think there is a good chance that everything could be cleared up. That or I am sadly mistaken, and pathetic and my friendships matter more to me than to my counterparts. I don't want to think that, but how can I not?

I am angry. I am angry because I am being shut out and I don't like it. I am angry because I am hanging on to a remote possibility that things can heal and grow and move on after they've been neglected and then ripped open, and left to bleed. I am angry because I know that I am not the only one who cares... but that either pride or fear or simple weariness is standing in the way of resolve. But I am also fearful... fearful that my vengeful side will win and I will ruin my chances... I don't fight for every friendship. SOME PEOPLE JUST AREN'T WORTH MY TIME. But some ARE, and unfortunately I fear the other parties do not feel the same. Do I need to just wake up and smell the rejection? Or should I nurse the hope that it'll all be fine?

I should also mention, that this is a direct result of honesty... honesty I felt was long overdue, and put nicely at that. Whoever said 'Honesty is the best policy' is full of shit. That or I am a really shitty judge of character.

***Edited to say HAPPY 25TH B-DAY TO JESSICA B.! I hope it was a good one girl:-)

Thursday, June 20, 2002

Sunny Days, Pushing the Clouds Away...

Today is a great day. It's warm and beautiful... a day for cruising in your car, windows down, pretending it's a sporty little Convertible cabriolet, speeding 10 mph over the speed limit, blasting "cruel to be kind" by Letters to Cleo and singing your heart out.

That was until I got back to the office, and let cackles irritate me by turning up the already chilly air conditioning. WTF?????? How about taking a poll to see if everyone is as warm as you are, we don't all sweat through our shirts you know. As soon as he retreated into the bathroom, and I was assured he'd be in there for a few minutes, by the symphonic range audible to anyone within 50 freakin feet, I quickly got up and turned the cold air blower off. Though, not to be outdone by Sir-piss-me-off-a-lot. Upon exiting the shitter, he asked me to please refill the towel dispenser with towels. Again, WTF???????? DO I LOOK LIKE YOUR SLAVE??? I responded with my usual blank stare, and muttered "I don't know how." He replied that he didn't know how before either, and figured it out when he loaded the dispenser last time. Well woopty freakin doo. Here, have a cookie. YOU ACTUALLY DID SOMETHING OTHER THAN SIT AT YOUR DESK AND CACKLE? Me thinks you must be sick. Anyway I just looked at him and said "whatever."

I'm sorry, but I am sick and freakin tired of him feeling the need to delegate certain menial tasks to me. It's only the menial shit... like that, and the housecleaning. NO. uh huh. I am not the maid, and just because I am a chick, doesn't mean I clean up after all the big men. Not happening, and I can guarantee you, the level of towels in the dispenser will stay the same. I am not a feminist by any means, but I have a real issue with being treated like his personal slave.

That said, it really is a lovely day, and it's about to get better since cackles is out of the office for the rest of the day around 3pm!!! Lucky me! I really need to get a grip on this though, he just drives me up the wall... his voice, his face, his presence. I detest it all. And for no particular reason, other than we got off on the wrong foot... and have continued to trip and falter on that same foot. That and he just irritates the shit out of me. Eventually when I leave here to work someplace else... he will be one of the only things I absolutely won't miss, and depending on when I decide to go; he may be the key factor in that decision.

Hey did you hear Aerosmith and Run DMC and Kid Rock are going on tour together? They will be in Seattle... well Tacoma actually on Nov. 12th I think. I am so there.