Monday, December 31, 2001

NEW YEAR'S SUCKS You know, I have never had a good New Year's. Not since I was a kid anyway; I usually just stay home; and when I do go out; it's always been a bust. I've given up, it's almost easier to accept that New Year's just sucks. Have you ever seen that movie 200 Cigarettes? It's one of my favorites, and it's about New Years Eve 1980, and how it takes 15-20 different people all over New York City; and they end up at this one party; and no-one leaves the party with who they came with. It's a great little flick; my favorite person in the movie is Martha Plimpton; only because her character is throwing the party; and is feeling immense pressure about having a good turnout. She is hilarious. The film also stars Paul Rudd, Courtney Love, Janeane Garofalo, Christina Ricci, Casey Affleck, Ben Affleck, Gaby Hoffman, Kate Hudson, Jay Mohr, and Dave Chappelle. It's really funny; and Elvis Costello even makes a cameo.

I am so hooked on that old song "End of the Road" by Boyz II Men. Every once in a while; I'll start listening to old cd's and sometimes I just get hooked... a few months ago it was "Be my Lover" by La Bouche.

I have to say, I was really productive this weekend. I cleaned Friday night, and spent most of Saturday running errands. Then on Sunday I completely cleaned out my storage unit. I probably threw away half of what was in there. A LOT of magazines... probably over 100 issues... don't know why I was saving them anyway. Some misc. stuffed animals, a lot of old cooking stuff that is so old and rusty now; it'll just get thrown out when I finally move into my own place anyway. I have a lower unit; so I hit my head twice; really hard, the second one prompting me to start screaming "MOTHERFUCKER!" over and over until the ringing in my ears stopped. Then as I was looking through a crate, I stepped wrong and my flip flop broke; leaving me with one shoe. It was a great day. I finally got everything packed back in there, I still have room for more stuff thank God; my rolly cart, and a few trunks from my room hopefully. I went outside to start throwing away my garbage ( I had two huge sacks full and about 12 boxes full of trash; not to mention the stacks of magazines and shit) There is always a lock on the garbage can... why, I don't know; because you have to have a code to get into the storage lot, and that's where the dumpster and recycle bin is. So I noticed the recycle bin wasn't locked and thought Screw it, I pay a lot of money for storage here, and they lock the trash can? Plus I was only wearing one sandal; I looked straight up welfare, and didn't want to go into the rental office and ask for a key like that. so I started chucking everything into the recycle bin. (I don't feel good about that; I know one piece garbage can ruin a dumpster full of recycling, but I figured if I fill it with trash, it'll be ruined; not by just one piece...) I was about 80% done when the owner comes out of his office running and waving his arms. (Seriously) telling me that was the recycling only. (I wondered 'why does he care?' then it occurred to me he probalby gets a fine or something if it's filled with garbage) so he jumps into the bin and starts pulling all of my shit out of there; I in turn, start filling the dumpster he unlocked for me. I filled it; in fact it was overflowing, and he starts making comments like it's a courtesy; not a dumping ground. I was like "dude, I've been a paying customer here for like 4 years. If I want to clean out my storage unit once every couple years and fill the freakin dumpster, I don't think that's a lot to ask."

When I got home I completely cleaned my room; and spent the rest of the evening watching movies and crocheting. It was a nice night. I got a lot more done yesterday than I had planned, so now, by the end of january: i want the rest of my stuff from my cedar chest and my closet packed up and put into storage, then I'm going to prime and sand my walls. I'd like to be ready to paint by February 1st. Maybe I'll post pictures from my room so you can see the progress I'm making... it will surely be a huge difference when I'm done. Right now, my room is sponge painted teal and has light lavender splatters all over the wall (those are what I need to sand) I have these standard apartment issue white vertical blinds that are just friggin ugly; and my closet doors are an atrocity. I will be painting my room a dark purple, and then my drapes and furniture will all be an antiqued looking Olive Green. I am going to get a new mirror for when I do my makeup and I am going to get a strip of beauty lights to go above it; like in movie star's dressing rooms. I am going to have a lot of shelves as well; I used to have my room plastered with photographs; I was big into painting my own frames. I packed all of those away; it was just getting old you know? I need to get an olive colored duvet now, and some new sheets. I am really excited about changing my room; I haven't had a big project in sooooo long. Lori is going to change her room too; she's painting it pink and purple. Well folks, that's all for today... Oh yeah, one more thing; I will take pictures of my autograph wall and put them on this site. I have a small wall I painted light blue and most of my friends have signed it at one time or another... maybe I'll do that this weekend.... I don't think I'm going to paint over that; I like it too much. Have a great new Year!!!

Friday, December 28, 2001


Well, tonight I am going to start packing shit up for storage. I can't take the mess anymore. I am going up to the storage unit tommorrow to start the cleanup process. I was talking to Lori last night and then to Maria and Holly; and I think now, I'll paint my room a dark purple; and have all of the accents green... we'll see. I hooked up my dvd player and cleaned up my room a little bit, made my bed, it was a productive night!

I think I'm going to go see the royal tenenbaums tonight, then either tommorrow or sunday I told dad I'd take him to see Ali. I wanted to take him to see ocean's eleven (again! He hasn't seen it; but I have, I love it) but he really wants to see Ali. I am apprehensive because I love the ads for that movie, and I doubt the movie will live up to them. We'll see though... anyhoo, you may have noticed Opie on the front page of this site in a prom dress... you want the details on that picture, email me, and I'll be glad to give them. Have a great weekend!

Thursday, December 27, 2001


Is it just me, or have you noticed that Meg Ryan's upper lip is thicker? Seriously. I watch the Kate and Leopold ads and her upper lip is 2-3 times thicker than it was just a few weeks ago when I watched When Harry met Sally. It's not obscenely huge; it's just noticeable.

I had a nice Christmas, was pleasantly surprised by many of the gifts I got, and also had a great time giving out gifts and goodie baskets. Lori (my sister) got me some Hawaiian print seat covers for my car. Those are awesome, I just gotta find a bench cover; have yet to locate one. I just know when I do; it'll cost a freakin arm and a leg. Last night Lori and I went to the mall; to use our gift cards and return the stuff that didn't fit or wasn't us. I only had to return one thing, and with that and a gift card I bought my favorite perfume Lucky and a gift set including concentrate, lotion, powder and body spray. I love Lucky perfume. Totally my favorite. Then we indulged a bit; or actually more than a bit and bought some good makeup. We bought eyeshadow by Benefit; it's really sparkly, and m*a*c lipstick... I spent about 60 bucks on 3 tubes of lipstick and one eyeshadow. Is that sick or what? But every once in a while you gotta; and many of those eyeshadows are better than the cheap stuff.

I think I have decided what I want to do with my room. I took down almost all of the posters and crap on my walls; including all the painted picture frames I spent hours on. I am going to have a much more relaxed atmosphere in there. I have decided that 2002 is the year to simplify. I will clean up my credit, my storage unit, and my room; (not necessarily in that order) I am going to paint my walls an olive green color and then all of my furniture will be a royal purple; my dresser will be a mix of the two; I will get more shelves; and just really make it look nice. A lot of my stuff will be put into storage; I can't take the clutter anymore. As for my storage unit; I need to just start throwing shit away. There comes a point when I just gotta cut the cord on some of that stuff.

Sunday, December 23, 2001


Well, it's been a pretty good couple of days, I gotta say. I ended last week with a surprise party for a friend of mine, Happy 23rd birthday Holly!!! Then on Friday, our company had an office party that ended with everyone getting bonuses... I work for a great company now! Before we were all miserable; and there was no morale. Now, we are happy; and content; and best of all; appreciated! I was up until 3am cooking christmas cookies. I found a new frosting recipe that hardens; so when you pack them into boxes or whatever to give away; they don't smudge and smear. If you want the recipe; email me and I'll be glad to give it to you. Saturday I baked all day again, and then went over to Troy's house, where I got to sit and visit with Michael; who I adore, Jessica and Andrew were also there.

Andrew is so funny; I can't believe he's 4 already. (For anyone who doesn't know, he's my Godson.) He says "Jeckissa" for his mom's name, it's so cute. He loved playing with Percy and Chester; the dogs, but after awhile it became apparent that he's allergic to the dogs. His little eyes swelled up and his face was beet red. Poor guy.

Well, tommorrow we are baking (AGAIN) and will go over to Karen and Gary's for dinner. I will check back in on Wednesday; December 26th to update you on the happenings of Christmas and what's new with my big ol' crazy family. Till then, God Bless, and Merry Christmas.

Tuesday, December 18, 2001

Hardy Har Har

It seems like my new favorite thing to do is quote movie commercials; only the really strange lines though; my sister and I go back and forth on them... yes we're dorks, but it's fun. My favorite this year was from the movie: 'the others' "You're mad, I am your daughter" (in a childlike voice laden with a heavy english accent) or in Domestic Disturbance with John Travolta when his pubescent son screams "DAD!" and his voice cracks like 10 times in that one word. Then there was Freddy Got Fingered "daddy would you like some sausage". Who can forget Don't Say a Word with Michael Douglas and Brittany Murphy "I'll never tell". Then of course the bring it on reference in Not Another Teen Movie " Then you better Brrring it" " Oh! It's already been broughten!" and now, Vanilla sky " MURDER!" It's too easy; to laugh at and make fun of.

Just random thoughts today I guess, lol.

Monday, December 17, 2001


Well; my philosophy on not trusting doctors is proving to be true. My dad had to get a new doctor; because the office where his old one of many years practiced was shutting down. So, his neurologist prescribed him all of his regular meds until they could find a new doc. Dad has been taking 120 milligrams of Phenobarbital a day for over 36 years. Four small 30 milligram pills ever day. It's never changed. Well; for the last month to two months, dad has been super lethargic, and has been acting wierd... just really slow; and has been slowly losing the capabilities he regained after his stroke. We were very worried about him; and we were almost wondering if he was getting ready to have another stroke. Dad was getting frustrated because we were constantly commenting on it; and making him feel bad (that was not our intent though). Come to find out; the Neurologist prescribed my dad's Pheno at 60 milligram pills and didn't tell my mom. The awesome brainiacs at Walgreene's failed to mention anything to her either; we've been getting his pills there forever. so for the past month-or two dad's been getting a double dose of phenobarbital. Which is a barbituat (sp?) which is like a sedative ultimately. Mom could've killed him. The doctor of course offers no apologies and the incredible mind wonders at Walgreenes give you their trademark blank stare... dad's going in for an m.r.i tommorrow to see if there is any long term damage. Transferring him from his wheelchair to bed is like lifting 180lb sack of potatoes. Say a prayer if you will that there's nothing to worry about.

It just amazes me at the level of selfishness some people live their lives on. It's a sad, sad fact; and what's sadder is when it spills onto other people; and they too become selfish. I tell you this much; my friendships whether they've ended or are still continuing are lessons... even though some are only lessons on how not to raise a son or daughter. My bad for investing waaaaaay too much time in assholes.

Friday, December 14, 2001

Random Thoughts

There are some movies coming out that I really want to see. Vanilla Sky and Not Another Teen Movie open tonight; I would totally be at one of them, but Lori and I are going up to granite falls this weekend to babysit our cousins. It'll be a relaxing getaway though; that's for sure. I also can't wait to see Ali and the Royal Tenenbaums.

I bought Mr. Hankey's Christmas Classics cd from the South Park kids. It's awesome, my favorite track right now is Dreidel, Dreidel, Dreidel. Some of the songs are a little offensive; but it's funny as hell.

I have been going nuts on ebay lately. I've bought 3 books, 5 movies, and a cd single on there; and have only spent 50 bucks. That's awesome.

I was in the car today and remembered one of my best times this year. I had a dinner party in March when my parents and sister were out of town; I had about 11 people there, and it remains one of my best memories ever. We had spaghetti, and played games. It was great because some of the people I hadn't seen in a long time, and for sure other's hadn't seen each other since high school. It was a great way to catch up and reminisce. I smiled just thinking about it.

Well, that's all for me, gotta run and check the traffic, hope all is well with you all; have a great weekend. Only 11 more days till Christmas!

Tuesday, December 11, 2001


I am so pissed right now. Apparently I am a 'witch'. That dick that I work with is officially mad at me. I called corporate this morning because he was doing an install of a radio into an ambulance, and he was in our garage at work doing it; with the doors of the garage and vehicle closed, and he was smoking. That's the 3rd time I've personally seen him smoking out there; and they said something to him. He ends up blowing up at me, telling me I better watch my back, because anything I do; he's going to report to corporate, yadda yadda yadda, then when I told him I didn't tell him first because the last time I spoke to him about anything, he accused me of laughing at him and being rude. He started yelling at me that I did. I said "no, I didn't" and he put his hand up and kept saying "whatever witch. " I was SO MAD!

Monday, December 10, 2001

Pedal to the Metal

Well I had a bit of a scare on Friday. After driving out to pick up my friend Holly w/ my sister Lori, we were headed to the southcenter area to go shopping, get a bite to eat and go see Ocean's 11. Well, we were getting ready to make a left onto military to head down Southcenter hill... if you have ever seen this hill; you know it is freaking steep. It's huge; whenever it's slightly icy, they close it down. I am uncomfortable driving up it when it rains; just not a nice hill. Anyway, right as I'm stopping to wait for the light, my brakes all of a sudden go out. My foot slips all the way down to the floor; and we are rolling. Panic ensues. I started freaking out; and immediately pulled the ebrake. (almost sounds like an internet company huh? Ebrake.) anyway, I digress. After calling home, and putting fluid in the master cylinder, I still had barely any brake power. So, I parked the car at Holly's and we took her car. Didn't let it mess with our plans, though we weren't able to go shopping, we just went and got dinner at Azteca and then saw the movie. (Which I LOVED!) At the end of the evening, I decided to take the car home; I didn't want to leave it there; and it was late. A drive that normally takes me 10 minutes took 40; I don't think we went over 20 mph more than once or twice.

Luckily, I have great family members, and my cousin Danny was able to fix it for me on Saturday. Of course, not until after I waste time by being a complete and total idiot. We went up to Schucks looking for a Left rear brake hose for an 81 or 85 honda civic hatchback. I couldn't remember if it was an 81 or 85. Noone would answer the phone at home, so we turned back and decided to call around; it seemed that noone had the part. We got back and looked on the door panel and saw that it was manufactured in September of 1981; so we continue to call around for a 1981 honda civic hatchback. Then my dad comes into the living room; and overhears me say 1981 and he's like "it's a 1982." I said "no, the door said 1981", dad said it was manufactured then; but released as an 82. I felt so dumb; then about 10 minutes later; he had to correct me again; because I drive an accord not a civic. I felt so damn stupid. I don't know why I ALWAYS think it's a freakin civic; but I had wasted a good hour of our time by then. I felt bad for Danny, but he was a good sport. Finally Napa autoparts had the part, and they are now my favorite auto store.

I am leaving here (work) today at 1pm, we are going to a local television show; Northwest Afternoon. My mom and aunt are hoping to talk to the psychic that will be on there. He specializes in speaking to the dead. Wish us luck!

Friday, December 07, 2001


I am soooo glad that today is the weekend! You have no idea! I am finally feeling better today; so much better that I even put on makeup and did my hair. (wow, I know) I think I was scaring the guys at work with my 'au naturel' approach. I just didn't give a shit. Anyway, I was driving to work this morning, listening to Howard Stern, and he was bitching about the quality of the recording he was playing, it was an audio clip of Jim Carrey on Oprah; needless to say they were making fun of it. But at one point he says "what, is it NOT 2001?" and I started smiling, totally thinking of a time when I embarrassed my friend choni at the movies. We used to go see a movie every Monday night; it was our ritual; our "escape from southtown" (the daycare we worked at). Well, we were usually a little late; in fact I have never seen the beginning to a great many films, we were either obscenely early or totally late. Anyway, that day we would have been early had the atm machines at the theater been working properly. I of course, never carry cash; I am a check person. I don't like using my visa; but I do on occasion and this time was one of them. Well the attendant told me that their debit lines were down, so they were only able to accept cash. I asked if I could go ahead and use the atm machine inside and the guy said it was down too. Then I asked if they accepted debit at the snack counter and he said no. I was frustrated, and semi pissed, so I look at Toni and go" I'm sorry, my bad, I THOUGHT this was the year 2000, clearly I was mistaken. Jesus, we were supposed to be riding in flying cars at this friggin point, and we can't even use our atm cards to buy a damn ticket. Marvelous!" This sends Choni into barrells of laughter, and we ended up going a few blocks away to Drug Emporium to use their debit machine. So now, that has become my favorite line to use on people when something simple can't happen; particularly if it's a technical problem... "I'm sorry, I thought this was the year 2001, the 'space age'."

Anyway, well; I work with a psycho. I hope he doesn't know I have this website; otherwise this could get tricky. He's usually really happy go lucky; and really nice. Not to mention super f@!#ing annoying. I usually give him the cold shoulder just so he'll leave my area and shut up, and it's never been an issue. He thinks I'm a bitch, and then goes away. I'm ok with that. Well then out of nowhere about 2 weeks ago he accuses me of laughing at him and 'finding him amusing'. As if I was making fun of him, and he's really pissed off and militant about it. I was like whatever, and I've been ignoring him. We were the only two people in the office when it happened, if anyone else had been here; I might have told him to shove it; and quit talking to me that way, but like I said, he seems a little unhinged, and I make it a policy not to provoke anyone who's one cheeseburger short of a happy meal. Well he was pissy for about 3 days, and now he's back to his old self; all happy and smiley and acting like nothings wrong. I'm still pissed off about it, so I don't acknowledge his presence unless necessary; and today he got pissy with me when I told him something. He only gets this way when everyone else is out of the office... I looked his name up on google to make sure he doesn't have any bad stuff on him, you'd be surprised what you can find when you look people up on there. I put my own name in and came up with my site, plus my ancestry and an old mssg. board entry from a few years ago. But he seems clean...

I am going to see Ocean's 11 tonight. Can't wait. I don't usually like movies like this one is supposed to be, but something's drawing me to it. Have you seen the ALI previews? Whoever put those together did a great job. They are so upbeat and energetic; that music just makes you want to go see it. I am also anticipating Vanilla Sky and Not Another Teen Movie. "Well you better BRRRRRring it" "Oh it's already be BRRRRroughten" I love that! I wasn't going to see Vanilla sky, because I cannot stand Penelope Cruz. She drives me up the wall; listening to her talk makes me want to choke something. And I think Tom Cruise is a Dick. But it does look like a good film, and Cameron Crowe doesn't usually disappoint.

I am so not in the christmas spirit this year. If it was up to me we wouldn't even get a tree. It seems like a big ol' pain in the ass this year. My heart is just not in it.

Monday, December 03, 2001


Man, well I went to the doctor today. Apparently I only catch viruses. But this doctor wasn't sure so she gave me zithromax... which I had to drop 51 bones on, because they "can't bill cobra". Since our company was bought out, Cobra has taken over our insurance stuff. I had to pay for the medicine full on, then submit my receipt to Cobra to be paid back. What a pain in the ass. My doctor thinks I may have a light case of mono. (is that how it's spelt? Mononeucleosis...) My glands and throat are swollen, and sore; I feel like SHIT! I am sooo tired, but hopefully this medicine will help. Incidentally, since I've been sick I haven't been wearing makeup or doing my hair. I also haven't been pushing my nose screw back into place; you see, a nose screw is a really long earring stud. they bend it so it doesn't come out easily, and generally stays in place. Unfortunately, after the swelling went down, I needed to go back and have the bent part tightened up. I haven't had time to do it lately, and so if I don't push the end way back and hook it as far back as possible, it has a tendency to hang out of my nostril. Looking like a big ol' gold booger. This can be embarassing, and I don't hook it when I'm sick because it hurts to blow my nose. (sorry if this is grossing you out) Anyway, after the doctor looked me over, and took some throat cultures, and left the room, I happened to get a glimpse of myself in the paper towel dispenser. I had forgotten to hook it, and there it was, in all it's glory, hanging out of my nose. I wanted to die. How embarassing, I felt like an ass. Anyway...

You know what's wierd? Lately I have been coming to the realization that I am living my life on some level of denial. Lately I find myself forgetting that my dad has not always been in a wheelchair... that my grandma has passed away... I live it, but I don't think about it... oh yeah, my dad had a stroke. A STROKE. His stroke is what runs my life... it's not his fault, but it's the reason and cause for a lot of different things. I get so numb to that fact that I forget about it, I forget he was independent for 48 years. I forget he once worked for a living, that he used to feed ME. I see my grandma's picture, and sometimes it's a blow, to remember that she's not here anymore. I grieve silently for her; because I've learned that crying gets you nowhere with a headache, and fast. It sucks.