There is a pox on my house.

So guess who got the stomach flu last night?  I came home at 12:30 as the boys were getting out of school early for conferences and we didn't have child care.  Aaron left for work at 1:30 and I was starting to feel... off.  I was achy and just sort of cold.  I let the boys play xbox and laid down, and didn't get up until the prospective Nanny (Brianna) showed up for her interview at 4:30.  I was out of it, I was disheveled. I should have cancelled.

We chatted, the boys showed off... it was kind of horrifying.  At one point, Nolan comes out of their bedroom and is pointing one of his nerf guns at me and says "I could murder you."  ...  The fuck?  I have never heard him use the word murder before, and he chooses to use it in front of a possible new nanny?  I gave him the stink eye and said "Really? Does that seem appropriate to you?" He laughed and ran back into his room. Then Seth started repeating everything I was saying and didn't stop until I threatened a time out.  About that time Nolan came out and had two guns and said he wanted to be a murderer for halloween.  I tried to laugh it off.  I was starting to sweat a little bit and had no energy for these shenanigans.  Nolan sat at the table, and said "man, I wish Ruth-Marie was here so bad.  Do you know who Ruth-Marie is?" I managed to sort of distract him before she could answer, though the fucker kept saying it.  (Ruth-Marie is our current nanny who we are having to replace while Aaron is on swing shift, she is unavailable in the evenings.)  Nolan was writing and Brianna said "so do you know how to write your name Nolan?"  My ever so charming child looked at her like she had two heads and said "uh... duh.  I'm in 2nd grade." ALRIGHTY then.

What the fuck is it when we have these people come over to interview and they pull out the rude heathen behavior?!

Anyway, about that time I was feeling very shaky and sweaty and a little scared that I was going to puke in front of her, so I abruptly sort of ended the interview "well thanks for coming over!" and led her out.  It was awkward.  I shook her hand, shut the door and bolted to the sink and puked my guts out.   The boys were completely freaked out, Seth started crying and said "are you going to go live at the hospital again?" I managed to clean myself and the sink up and then we watched two movies, they ate cereal for dinner and I collapsed on the couch.

Today I feel better overall, but I'm achy as all get out.  ugh.  Aaron came home with some digestive issues and I'm really REALLY hoping that's all it is, and he doesn't get the flu.  ugh.

Who is this man child?

Seth's favorite pasttime is kitty torture.