Monday, June 12, 2006

It does not take a village... to name a child.

Contrary to popular belief that is.

Let me back up for a second here... I've had a lot of requests it seems recently (online and in real life) to divulge our name choices for the bean that is currently cooking. In real life I'm likely to list a few of the names (which honestly are pretty much the same as the ones we debated w/ nolan) and be done with it. I am not necessarily comfortable with this conversation because, as I learned when planning my wedding and having Nolan, people love to give their honest opinion when it really doesn't matter.

I want to start off first by saying that there might be a few people who think this entry is aimed at them, it's not. I'm hormonal and bitchy right now so I'm going to go off on a tangent, so it's not a personal letter to you at all, and no offense is intended.

The (few) names Aaron and I have come up with are very similar (might in fact be the same) as the names we debated w/ nolan. We do not come up w/ names so we can shock people, or so that we can be the talk of the... family/neighborhood/circle of friends or whatever. If a name is on the list, it's because WE LIKE IT. So when someone says something to shoot it down, I (not aaron, as he doesn't give a rats ass what people think) take it personally. That might be my own fault, whatever... I know I put too much stock into what people think, (which I'll address in a moment) but that's me. And sometimes, it would be nice if when I'm telling someone the names instead of telling me their honest opinion, they could just nod and smile. I didn't ask for your opinion. You asked to know what was on our list. There is a big difference.

The biggest thing I get is "they are going to be teased." Yeah, my kids probably will be teased. All kids at one time get teased. I was teased ALL THROUGH SCHOOL. In grade school I was teased because I was overweight. **I might note that this pisses me off, because I was not a fat kid, I had some chub but my GOD, I have seen some of the obese children of today and I would have been considered skinny compared to them!** I was teased because I wore glasses. I was teased because I got good grades. I was teased because I didn't have a boyfriend (whatever that meant in the 5th grade). In the 6th grade it was a HUGE faux pas to not have an Esprit bag to carry your books... I got one, but by the time I did, all they had left was mustard yellow. So I got teased because I had an ugly one.

I might add in the 6th grade I was teased because my best friend's name was tottie. Yes, tottie. I was teased MERCILESSLY because I did not excel in gym class, and there were times in my elementary career where I was physically ill over the thought of attending p.e. class. On field day in the 5th grade, I was put on a team w/ 2 boys who tormented me daily. Every time it was my turn to go and partipate in an event they cheered me on, only instead of saying 'go allison' or the like, they called me 'snout' and said "go snout, come on snout"... blah blah blah.

I was not popular because of my appearance in general. I wore slacks to school. slacks. in the 4th, 5th and 6th grade. My grandparents, God love em, had the best intentions, and they weren't ugly... but they weren't cool ... at all. They weren't in the same universe as jeans or leggings (I did have leggings too, but the slacks sort of erased any popularity potential I might've had.)

In the 5th grade I chopped my hair off. Boy style... only my mom refused to let me wear it boy style (which I'm sure is a good thing, as I would have endured a whole new type of teasing there), so I had to 'set' it. As in w/ a fucking curling iron. Why I went for it, I don't know. But I wanted short hair. Well if the slacks and the tummy and the glasses didn't have me in social exile, my hair certainly did.

In middle school I was called everything from tub of lard to nerd to geek to ... well, you name it. I was teased for being a bookworm, I was teased for being overweight, I was teased for the mortal sin of wearing pro-wing sneakers (volume shoe source brand). Boys would ask me out in front of shop class (I knew they were not serious, as I was shy, not stupid) and when I would ignore them all of the popular kids would laugh and congratulate each other on humiliating yet another soul who just wanted to be left alone.

Some idiot I rode the bus w/ in 7th grade thought it would be funny to tell people I was a lesbian. that was fun. I wasn't, obviously, but Being different = social suicide in middle school. So for the next 2 years I got to hear the words lesbo and dyke a lot.

In high school... I wasn't really teased that much. I mean, I took my fair share of rude comments here and there, but it was a different world than elementary or middle school, and while I certainly wasn't popular, I didn't feel so singled out and made fun of. That's probably why I loved it so much, it was the first time where the teasing and harassment wasn't daily and wasn't brutal.

Do I feel victimized by all the teasing I went through in elementary and middle school? No. I don't.

So, back to the topic at hand... do I think by naming my child something different he will be teased? I don't know. Maybe. He'll be teased for a variety of reasons in his life I'm sure. And in this day in age where the classrooms are more multicultural than ever, and his playmates have names that run the gamut from Khalid, Muhommad, Singh and the like... I don't think his name will stand out that much. And if it does, well he'll weather it. Like we all do.

So before you comment and tell me what you REALLY think of our name choices so far, know that if you are rude I will ban you from commenting again. Not that opinions matter at all, I'm just saying.

We are thinking that baby's middle names will be Aaron's full name: Aaron Russel... (and this does double duty as Aaron's middle name is after his grandfather.)

So, the list is as follows: (in somewhat order of importance... all are both Aaron and Allison approved)


If we end up deciding not to use Maverick as a first name, it will likely be included in the middle name as 'Aaron Maverick'... such as Adam Aaron Maverick or Seth Aaron Maverick.

That is what it stands at now.

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