Monday, July 25, 2005

Muddling Through

Nolan and I and Aaron are all hanging in, and hanging out. Not too much is really going on... we had a BIIIIG weekend, am a bit tired today, though much better since I got to catch up on a little sleep this morning. Saturday we went to a parade in West Seattle... Nolan did great; got hungry in the middle of it, and Aaron had to help me situate myself with the blanket... to which Nolan responded by constantly pulling away, arching his back and being genuinely insulted that I would try and feed him under a blanket.

After that we drove up to Stanwood to visit Aaron's aunt and uncle and grandma. On the way home from there we stopped and visited his cousin and his fiance... who are also Nolan's other godparents (in addition to Lori and Matt)... it was a great day. Sunday we futzed around, and ended up going to the bite of seattle. Normally a great time, but it was INCREDIBLY crowded... and I must not be a very good Bite of seattle girl because we came home and I threw up everything I had eaten. Fun. No idea why... just felt a little sick and wham-o, up and out. Yikes.

Today was Nolan's debut at my mom's work, and then we stopped in at my friend Toni's work as well. I almost stopped by my old office, but satchel dickface's car was there and I just don't need that kind of aggravation.

Jamie in the guestbook (I am too lazy to link, but it's http://jamsjunction.diaryland.com/), asked:

I know that you are fairly new in your marriage, but have been with Aaron for some time...So how hard of an adjustment has it been adding a baby to your family? What has been the biggest adjustment, and what have you had the least problem with that you anticipated having a problem with?

Hmm... Aaron and I have been together 2.5 years so far... in December it will be 3 years. So by some standards, we didn't waste any time :-) However, I feel like we've been together forever... can't remember all those lonely years before hand, so it didn't seem like we rushed into anything. That being said, adding Nolan to the mix has been pretty easy. It was more of an adjustment I think for us to get used to me being pregnant as I had some wicked mood swings (and Aaron can correct me if I'm wrong on this), but having Nolan and getting things worked out has been as Aaron would put it "a piece of cake." ;-) This doesn't mean it isn't hard at times... Sunday morning, after 3 consecutive nights of less than 5 hours of sleep I had had it. I sat there and cried while Aaron slept next to me... truth be told I was pissed as hell that he was off snoring in slumber-land... but mainly just because there was no point in waking him up. Nolan wasn't fussing, he was just awake... I was tired... soo tired. Had slept all of 3 hours, and while the thought crossed my mind to wake Aaron up (because truthfully, had I done that, he would be a good sport about it; as he is just that nice.) but I didn't see the point. I'm the one who is nursing Nolan.. and I knew that if I let Aaron sleep; then I could get him up around 7 or 8 and have him be on baby duty while I got a few hours of sleep. It worked out perfect that way in the end... but I still sat there and cried... it's bleak in the middle of the night... during the day, no qualms at all. But when I'm exhausted and worn down, it truly feels horrid. I keep reminding myself how lucky I am because at least he wasn't fussing; just awake. That's been the only real adjustment... and as ready for it as you think you are, when you are just fucking tired, it doesn't help to remember that you knew moments like this would happen. You know?

Other than that, as far as our relationship and such... things are great. I think the biggest adjustment has been for me not working... I just feel strange being at home in the middle of the day. But I really have to say things are going well, and I feel bad and scared writing that like I'm bidding fate or the gods to come and fuck everything up... but I'm still tired!!!



Nolan decked out in his little swedish outfit



My lil swede



My little cousin Camryn, she was in the kiddie parade before the bigger parade on Saturday, and this was her float. :-)



Nolan was all ready for a day out and about!



Nolan and his grandma and grandpa at the parade on Saturday.



There I am introducing my cousins dan and cindy to Nolan



He also got his first ever bottle on Saturday, I wanted to make sure he was agreeable to the idea of drinking from it; as I have a high school reunion coming up and need to go get my hair done soon; so it'll be all Aaron for a few hours. :-)



I love this picture, he looks like a little shrimp :-)

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