Monday, April 11, 2005

2 years to 30

Today's my birthday. Big woo.

We also put an offer on yet another condo today, I wrote a killer suck up letter... well, maybe not killer, but if I laid it on there any thicker it wouldn't have been faxable. I am not stupid enough to think that because we made the offer on my birthday, that fate might be kind enough to smile down on us and make the deal go through. No... I just hope it's a quick and painless rejection so we can make an offer quickly on our 2nd choice. Time is running out folks.

I made a decision over the weekend that I probably will not be going to my high school reunion. At this moment I am DANGEROUSLY close to my highest weight ever. I am convinced I will reach that weight and possibly even bypass it. This scares the bejesus out of me, but what stresses me out about it even more is the idea of going to this reunion without losing hardly any of the weight I've put on. So I made a deal with myself... if I don't want to go, I won't. I'll probably want to go regardless, but if I am stressing out about the way I look, and I don't feel comfortable, then I'll skip it. That realization alone has taken a bit of the load off my shoulders. The reunion is a month and 6 days after my due date... so you can see why I was a bit worried. I am not and have never been of the mindset that I should give a shit about what a lot of those fuckers think of me...

but the fact remains that there was a handful of people I graduated with, with whom I still hold quite a bit of hostility towards... not like I lay awake at night hating them or anything. But really, I could give two shits if they lived or died, they are dicks and I didn't enjoy their presence in high school, and quite frankly, me showing up fatter than I was at graduation is not an option for my self esteem. I don't care if I just had a baby or not.

Anyway, check out the pregnancy journal for more info on how we celebrated my brithday with the family.

Tonight Aaron's making me dinner, and I'll probably get some homework done, I thought the days of me getting depressed on my birthday were over, but this year it's back with a vengeance. The nice thing is that the guys at work remembered and not only got me a cake but a gift card to home depot... and Satchel has been gone since last monday... so that's been nice. I've also gotten several e-cards from friends/family, and a few phone calls. That made me feel really good. Aaron stopped by and brought me a potted flower plant too.

Anyhoo, that's all for today, thanks for all the condolences by the way... I appreciate it, as does my family.



the only pic from my bday dinner where I don't appear as though I should be out grazing in a fucking meadow. GAH.

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