Wednesday, May 05, 2004


T-t-t-ttrainwreck part one yesterday's post in the wedding journal in case you missed it.

T-t-t-t-trainwreck part deux today's followup to yesterday's post.

Clicking on those links will undoubtedly prompt you for a password as my wedding diary is now password protected. I am doing this because as time goes on, there are certain details I want to be left a surprise for the groom and in this case, the bridal party. So if you are in the bridal party don't bother asking for a password cuz' it ain't gonna happen!

In other news I am seriously, SO FUCKING SERIOUSLY debating starting a journal where no-one in my real life will have access . There is some crazy shit that goes down that would be basically bad bad bad if I wrote it here, but I'm telling you people fucking amaze me. I am absolutely mystified sometimes when I hear about stuff that is going on in our friends and families lives. Seriously. Most of the good stuff I end up telling my friends as come on, everyone loves a little gossip. I swear if I were to write a book about some of this stuff it'd be a best seller. A wise person once counseled me against doing such a thing, as it gives license to basically be a shit and say things that are neither warranted or deserved. That's a good point, But I am thinking about it once again.

I googled the medication the doc put me on and imagine my surprise when a class action lawsuit for 'suicidal side effects' came up. A vote of confidence!

A funny little quirk about Aaron, when I plug his nose he freaks out "I CAN'T BREATHE! I CAN'T BREATHE!" Heh, I plug his nose because the reaction cracks me up. He says he panics when I do it. I also like to pretend I'm going to give him a smooch and then breathe on his glasses and fog them up. Yeah, he puts up with ALOT of shit.

My biology teacher told me to cut the attitude yesterday when I sent her an email objecting to having to buy supplies for a lab. I was a little surprised she was so blunt, but also amused. Because she may be reading this I will refrain from making any blatant derogatory remarks other than it must be awfully nice to make a professor's salary and assume everyone else does too. (I'm so failing that class.)

I told Aaron recently that I am tired of working and I want to be a stay at home cat mom. He laughed. 3 minutes later when Molly bit me I screamed "quit biting mother fucker!!!" Aaron piped up from the computer "I think before you become a stay at home cat mom we should discuss your language." heh.

In an effort to pay for this godforsaken wedding, I am selling everything that isn't nailed down on ebay and I was going through my bookshelf for the umpteenth time looking for that one title that would totally bring in the dough and came across the two steinbeck novels that sit there. Unread. They might bring in a couple bucks a piece, but I can't sell them. I like the idea of having actual literature on the shelf even though the books themselves bore me to tears, I just can't sell them.

Also, as another side note. When I sat in the girlie doc's office last week bawling because well, who knows, I'm a mess sometimes, and though I found it sort of funny that I was half naked and crying and he was the one who was uncomfortable, I did get him to write me a prescription for an anti-depressant. He wrote it for Paxil. Now, I've done some research ... I googled Paxil, Paxil weight gain, Paxil weight loss, I love Paxil and I hate Paxil. What I gleaned from that research is that Paxil seems to cause more weight gain than weight loss, and there are far more many people who hate it than love it. So I haven't got the rx filled yet because frankly, I gained weight on Zoloft and Paxil is in the same family. Paranoia cha cha cha. What antidepressants don't seem to make you gain weight? I've heard Wellbutrin doesn't (and by the way, couldn't find much for "I hate Wellbutrin" at all) and has anyone had any experience with Paxil? Am I being a ninny for not filling it?

I found some old mix cds this morning and relived the joy that is 'da dip' by freak nasty. I actually pondered for a moment if it would be appropriate wedding music.

I put my hand up on your hip
when you dip I dip we dip
you put your hand up on my hip
when I dip you dip we dip
I put my hand up on your hip
when you dip I dip we dip
you put yours, and I put mine
and we can do this low and rolling grind.

...hmm, maybe not so much.

oh yeah, and before I forget I am looking for a new hosting company. I pay 11.95 per month, if you have any recommendations I would love it!

I think Donald Rumsfeld might just be the devil himself. Did you hear the pompous jack ass on the Today show this morning? GAH.

"I will cut you"


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